transformyself

As I get older and more "single," I am experiencing a repulsion of public discussion of sex.

When my GF's show me sexting texts they get from men, it really makes me feel like throwing up.

I think this is actually one of the repercussions of living with an AH who had multiple affairs. Slowly, as the years went by, my desperation to be loved by him has been replaced by the desire for him to just go away-and quietly. I don't want to have sex with him, which is the one thing that kept us together that long. It's bizarre, but I'm grateful.

And my sex drive may be diminishing as a normal biological function, but this is a very specific reaction to my women friends or men friends talking about sex.

just thought I'd ask here where it's safe. Hope ya'll are doing well

Love, Transform

CeciliaV

Maybe it's the 13 years of Catholic school, but I've never been comfortable with "public" discussions about sex...or discussions about sex at all, for that matter! There's just certain things I don't want to know about other people's private lives, close friend or no. I'm a very visual person and I don't want that visual!

LexieCat

I'm the same way. I'm fine with listening to graphic descriptions when it is necessary in order to help support someone who needs it (a DV victim I'm working with, or someone in the program I'm working with), but just to hear about the details, in a "Sex and the City" kind of way, nuh-uh, too much info, indeed.

suki44883

Good to see you again, transform! I've been thinking about you and wondering how things were going with you.

I agree that public talk of personal issues like this is just TMI. I really don't want to know what someone else is doing in the bedroom, or on the kitchen table or beside the washing machine.

choublak

You need friends who have better things to talk about.

Hanna

Ditto!
And also a Catholic School grad.

I have pretty much zero interest in hearing about anyone's biological functions except for medical reasons.

dandylion

Dear Transform, I agree with you. And, let me say that I AM NOT A PRUDE, either.

While we are on this subject---I am amazed at the extent that this has invaded the media in very recent times. For example--2 mainstream TV shows--"The View" and "The Talk" are laced with bedroom and bathroom talk I was watching a cooking show and the chef was talking about how he had made a sexy sandwich. ??????? Hoda and Kathy Lee same to have caught the same virus. What!??

At first, I thought it was just me--but, I'm glad to know that some other people feel the same. I feel for parents of young children, these days. If my children were still small I honestly don't know how I would protect them from the hypersexualalization.

I would love to hear what others think of this.

I repeat, I consider myself to be an enlightened, tolerant, open-minded person. I come from a medical background--so biology is not foreign to me.

sincerely, a puzzled dandylion

DreamsofSerenity

Talking about sex with my close friends does not bother me at all, but I totally agree there is some sort of hypersexualization going on in the media. Just the way young girls dress and act today is extremely disturbing. There doesn't seem to be any sanctity to sex anymore..

fourmaggie

aah yes, the "dating" scene HAS changed so much in my day also...

i still stick with my MORALS and VALUES on sex and dating....men crossing my boundaries to benift themselves dont work for me...never did...

women need to know that they dont have to take that crap...and stick with what they know..THEMSELVES...

i have laughed at many men in my time of being single and kick them to the curb...no wonder they are still single..."so hows that working for ya" is Dr. Phils famous line...in the end...it dont...

i offer more then "stexting", and i surely dont buy into it....

redatlanta

It doesn't bother me - but I worked in a hair salon where this was common discussion and on some levels you have to be open to your client to talk about what they want to talk about.

Personally I find sexting to be immature, it reminds me of writing notes in middle school and passing them. I had a bf who loved to do it and at first I found it exciting then it bored me. I wonder if he ever figured out that most of the time that I was replying I was watching a movie or giving myself a mani/pedi and could have cared less.