AH sick after drinking all day
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 585
Originally Posted by unhappyspouse 
The thing that gets me is the lying! How can you trust someone when your know that they have been, but have no PROOF and they make you feel like you just want to argue. I trust my gut instinct and I know he is not being abstinent, but he makes me feel like I am the crazy one! I guess I am going to have to catch him in the act.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 148
I know you guys are right - but I feel like if I dont prove myself before I leave, he will say that he started drinking because I left - I know that shouldnt matter - but it does! I want to prove to him that I am not crazy and I am not going to live with the lies and deceit! I have been working on my detachment - and that is so hard for me. He told me yesterday that we werent living like married people (because I am not lovie- dovie and laughing like I usually do) and he felt like nothing he did was right and he thought he should just leave. I didnt say anything....
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
HE knows what he's doing--why would you have to "prove" that he's drinking to HIM?
And let's say, hypothetically, that he admits he's drinking. He can still lie to tother people if he chooses to do that, and claim he was mister wonderful until you left.
You have the RIGHT to leave, whether he is drinking or not. Your name, "unhappyspouse," says it all. It is YOUR life--if your marriage makes you unhappy, regardless of whether there is a drinking issue, you have the right to end it. People do it every day. I left my first marriage because *I* was unhappy in it--in spite of the fact that my husband was fifteen years sober and a basically good guy.
And let's say, hypothetically, that he admits he's drinking. He can still lie to tother people if he chooses to do that, and claim he was mister wonderful until you left.
You have the RIGHT to leave, whether he is drinking or not. Your name, "unhappyspouse," says it all. It is YOUR life--if your marriage makes you unhappy, regardless of whether there is a drinking issue, you have the right to end it. People do it every day. I left my first marriage because *I* was unhappy in it--in spite of the fact that my husband was fifteen years sober and a basically good guy.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
