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Old 04-30-2004, 05:40 AM
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counseling

I think I need to find a counselor. I've been to a few alanon meetings in the past, but they weren't near as welcoming as SR. Anyway my question is for those of you out there who are in some kind of counseling or therapy, how did you find someone that you felt comfortable with? I really hate the thought of just picking someone out of the phone book!
Thanks for any info you may have.
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Old 04-30-2004, 07:52 AM
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Re: counseling

Hi, I have always had good results in looking in the phone book, I always pray first, trusting that God knows my needs even if I don't. A name will always jump out at me. I make the call, I try to feel out the person on the other end, are they attentive to my needs? And remember...you can interview them! I will pray for you.
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Old 04-30-2004, 08:37 AM
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Paula,
I had to pick out of a book, because I had to pick from a list of providers that my health insurance company would pay for. I called and talked to a few of them and picked the one that "sounded" right. You can always choose a different counselor if you start with one and it doesn't feel right.
Peace,
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Old 04-30-2004, 11:55 AM
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Re: counseling

Ditto. Prayed then picked.
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Old 04-30-2004, 12:44 PM
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Re: counseling

I talked to my primary care doctor, actually yesterday. He gave me a few people that he felt were excellent. I have an appointment in 3 weeks with one of them....seems so far away but I have waited this long! I am nervous too. I wish there was a garentee(sp?) that this would be a great match and things will just click. My doctor also perscribed prozac 20mg 1x a day. Has anyone had any experience with Prozac?
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Old 04-30-2004, 05:23 PM
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Re: counseling

Hmmm...I'm going to give you a different perspective.

My husband and I went on a whirlwind tour of marriage counselors last year, and I found that they were all very different, and some of them were unhelpful to the point of being incompetent.
Have you ever been to counseling before? Do you have a sense of what you want from the counselor?
By the end of our experience I learned that I needed to interview the counselor before making an appointment.
Do you want someone who plans to explore lots of why you are who you are? Or do you want someone who helps you understand what your options are for the future? Or do you want someone who's just empathetic and lends a good ear?

Eventually I found someone we both liked, but she ended up being not very well versed in substance abuse issues.

I specifically asked her what her methods are, what her philosphy is, how long most clients see her, and what kinds of assignments she expected us to do between sessions.

Just my experience. Good luck.

And have you tried multiple Al-anon meetings? They all have different feels.

I hope you find what works for you.
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Old 04-30-2004, 10:04 PM
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Re: counseling

Depends on beliefs/values, but I found that a counselor with christian perspective to be MUCH different than someone without..... I preferred someone who reminds me who I am to God and how valuable I am. Maybe your pastor is someone who might recommend someone. Word of mouth is probably very valuable if you know someone who is seeing someone good.
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Old 05-01-2004, 12:02 AM
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Re: counseling

Ask friends. That is how I found my therapist I used for codependency work.

But I also have called therapists and talked to them. If you have some idea of some of the things you expect from the therapist, you can interview them on the phone to get an idea of how they are with you. You also can ask to meet with them briefly, see if they will give you a free meeting for maybe 15 minutes.
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Old 05-01-2004, 03:29 AM
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Re: counseling

Originally Posted by kodfishy
Hmmm...I'm going to give you a different perspective.

My husband and I went on a whirlwind tour of marriage counselors last year, and I found that they were all very different, and some of them were unhelpful to the point of being incompetent.
Have you ever been to counseling before? Do you have a sense of what you want from the counselor?
By the end of our experience I learned that I needed to interview the counselor before making an appointment.
Do you want someone who plans to explore lots of why you are who you are? Or do you want someone who helps you understand what your options are for the future? Or do you want someone who's just empathetic and lends a good ear?

Eventually I found someone we both liked, but she ended up being not very well versed in substance abuse issues.

I specifically asked her what her methods are, what her philosphy is, how long most clients see her, and what kinds of assignments she expected us to do between sessions.

Just my experience. Good luck.

And have you tried multiple Al-anon meetings? They all have different feels.

I hope you find what works for you.
Funny you should bring that up. My counselor is a Christian. Her philosophy for counseling is exestintial. The funny part is that I am not Christian, and probably wouldn't have picked someone who was. My experience with her has had excellent results. Just goes to show God knows what I need better than I do. Hugs, Magic
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Old 05-01-2004, 05:05 AM
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Re: counseling

I have been in marriage counseling (with my ex, many years ago), but that is the only time. I know that I need to find someone who has experience with substance abuse, who can help me wade through all of the issues that go with it. I actually used to work at a rape crisis center, maybe the counselors there can recommend someone. Thanks alot for your replies, you have all been very helpful.
Paula
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Old 05-01-2004, 08:30 AM
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Re: counseling

paula,
Me and my AH are seeing an addiction/marriage counselor and it really helps, my ah had to pick one on his insurance list and NOW I feel certain that my HP was leading us to this one.....that was before I knew about Al-Anon. It was very uncomfortable at first talking personal stuff with a stranger but it also gave me a "safe" place to voice my feelings without them being squashed or made to feel stupid. I look forward to these sessions and really hate when we have to miss one due to a crazy work schedule. My H works for a soda company and delivers to the big stores and this time of year he never knows how late his day may be. Anyhow I'll stop rambling now, hope that helped somewhat.
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Old 05-01-2004, 08:36 AM
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Re: counseling

I wish I could get my AH to go to counseling. I have asked him several times and he flat out tells me no, he doesn't need to talk to anyone, we can fix this ourselves...ugh! Well, he can go ahead and fix himself and starting Monday I am going to look for someone to help me fix me. Thanks for all the help!
Paula
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