Sungrl

The addict in your life to despise questions? Regarding any subject. Not just the drinking or drugging. Mine was shady as hell on everything, just simple daily subjects turned into massive arguments. Can anyone relate??

Lifewillgetbet

We can do that.

FireSprite

Oh god yes. When he was actively drinking every conversation was me 'questioning him' in his opinion. He could turn any simple topic into a ridiculous argument. Sometimes it was his method of diverting my attention from his drinking & following the argument he had a great excuse to be angry with me & go off to drink more.

Sungrl

Bingo, that's how I feel. Make me the bad guy. the biatch. the crazy unreasonable person who wants to argue and fight all the time. The excuse to drink more, partake in shady behavior and have no accountability what so ever. Jerk.

miles72

XAG usually avoided answering any question, no matter how trivial. She'd be a terrific politician.

Lifewillgetbet

Its not even worth asking him an opinion, because he is not even himself. His opinion is coming from the active alcoholic brain.
When we are drinking we take very simple tasks and turn them into huge events.
Words directly from my psychologist's mouth " Its pathetic really".

Sungrl

Once again, spot on. If the conversation was having to do with anyhting that was upsetting or unsettling, as sometimes life can be. I always got yelled at for raising his anxiety and getting him all worked up.

FireSprite

I'm not even talking about asking him anything, he could start an argument over any single solitary statement directed to him or not.... once I walked outside, said something to the effect of "wow, what a beautiful day it is & look how BLUE the sky is!" and he disagreed with referring to that particular shade as blue so a huge argument ensued.

Yes, we were literally arguing over whether the sky was blue simply because I happened to speak out loud instead of just in my head. I wasn't even talking to him.

FireSprite

BTDT tooooooooooo many times. ((((HUGS))))

Sungrl

Yea, I was at the end of my rope. For some ridiculous reason I climbed up a little bit again and basically hung myself. Let me throw this out there to get some reaasurance that it's not just me. Is it "normal" to let a homeless alcoholic bum stay at your new place of residence while you go to work?? I mean it's winter in WI but why do that?? It just irks me.

Manmust

No, that's normal. Bring him to a shelter. Alcoholics will seek out alcoholics.

Sungrl

Exactly, that's what I thought. Thanks. I know it's NONE of my business and I took all my stuff from his place so I don't need to be concerned. Like I said it just ticks me off for some reason. Mostly I think it does, because he sees nothing wrong with it and calls me antisocial. Can you say projecting??

Manmust

Interesting, my AGf called me antisocial as I was sitting with her and her son in the living room on Monday while she downed a bottle of wine

Sungrl

I have been called that on numerous occasions. I guess because I don't drink like a fish and want to spend my time interacting with lowlifes. What's funny about the whole thing is that I am a very extroverted person. Friendly, talkative, funny. It used to bum me out that he didn't see that in me. I find it a pretty cool personalilty trait. Actually having a personalilty. His friends of choice were , and I am not exaggerating at all, homeless, jobless, criminals, drunks and drug addicts. Not my cup of tea. I thought he was better then that. He is, but until he sees that it's pointless.

Recovering2

It was impossible to have a normal conversation with my BF when he was actively drinking. He would pick a fight over the stupidest thing. I could eventually see what he was doing. He needed an excuse to leave the house, or go to the basement so he could drink. What better reason to drink than over a fight with me? When I started detaching, he couldn't drag me into a fight. It made him even crazier at first...I wasn't giving him the excuse he needed! So I took myself out of the equation, at least in that moment.

Redheadsusie

I could ask the simplest question say about the day or the house and he would say instantly- I am not going to argue with you? It left me thinking what the **** just happened here? Then he would say I made him drink................... Makes you crazy.............thank God my AH does not live here anymore :-)