Obsessive Thoughts
 

I know now what I was meaning about wanting to detach. I just wanted to get away from the obsessive thinking I fall into. It,s very unhealthy and unenjoyable.

I want to have nice pleasant constructive thoughts about the other person not obsessing and worrying about why they are doing this or saying that. It doesn,t bring any happiness or joy.

Nope, it sure doesn't.

It used to help me a bit if I could find something to do that required me to concentrate on something else. Your thoughts about him right now aren't likely to be pleasant or constructive. So trying to think of something else is the only thing likely to give you relief.

Hugs,

I relate, I met a couple of old guys at my second alanon meeting last year. They invited me out for ice cream after the meeting, which i reluctantly accepted. I told them about my obsessive deep fears of my wife and how it would get so bad I couldn't eat or sleep for days, some times I couldn't work. God what could i do??!! Well, they had some pretty good ideas.
Bob told me to have a train of thought planned, so when the obsessive thought started I could simply change my mind and think about some thing else. I had a work project that was very complex loaded for the next time hell hit. Sure enough next morning early my wife gets a text from some one I don't know, i go crazy....out of control, fear, panic, THEN WAIT!! I started thinking about the work project, damn this is complicated, all the angles that my coworkers needed to consider....would we make the deadline?? Would we be competitive in the market?? Later on the way to work I smiled:)...WOW this alaNon stuff is pretty cool. It was the beginning of the end of hell on earth. He also said as soon as possible to call some one, get to a meeting and talk about the victory of not losing control when the obsessive thoughts began. The people is the room seemed really, really excited to hear about this victory, because for ME this was a REAL victory. Honestly, I did not know I could change my mind.