im surrounded by crazies
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
im surrounded by crazies
Tonight was interesting as in obnoxious.
Ah drank 2 bottles and then stashed a larger bottle away for tomorrow.
2 short bottles and he then was starting to get ready for bed after he ate when
We get a knock at the door. This is late at night and not the appropriate time for someone
To come knocking at the door. Turns out its the neighbor whom asks for a beer.
(Two alchies enabling eachother me thinks) since we had no beer my ah decided to take his tomorrow liquor next door. I dont get mad. I dont even say anything. At this point ive learned to not care too much about his decisions and let him learn.
They drink outside and are probably gone for about an two hours before they both show up inside. Ah tells me the neighbors wife is mad so the husband is getting away a bit by hanging at our place. I dont say anything or argue. I figure itll pass hell leave and thatll be that.
Mind you apparently the wife was drinking with them so my ah tells me.
In short maybe ten minutes pass and the neighbor decides to go talk to his wife... (yes good idea!) BUT my ah wants to tag along with him (ughhhh what?!...drunk thinking right? Because in no way should he have even gone with him. Let them talk!)
So im sitting outside having a smoke and I hear a loud BANG and "you f****** a**h***"
I run inside to go to the front but as soon as I do my ah walks in and tells me the neighbors were bickering and the husband kicked their door in.
Aside from that I heard complaining from ah about the wife calling my husband a bad influence and him trying to tell the husband to stop before it got to that point.
Ah says hes never going to hang out with him again. I wish he would justvsee that thats what alcohol drugs etc do to people and that "mindframe" where people do not use their heads and act responsible but thats not going to happen yet. He was trying to tell me that alcohol had nothing to do with it....hell probably wake up tomorrow after he sobers up and think differently. I dont know but it was a crazy night.
Ps rehab still in the picture but thanks to corporate bs and red tape we have yet to see the pay raise on check and still many finances to catch up on.
Thought ide share my latest experience but im keeping my composure. Im not trying to control any aspects of his future recovery or drinking.
Ah drank 2 bottles and then stashed a larger bottle away for tomorrow.
2 short bottles and he then was starting to get ready for bed after he ate when
We get a knock at the door. This is late at night and not the appropriate time for someone
To come knocking at the door. Turns out its the neighbor whom asks for a beer.
(Two alchies enabling eachother me thinks) since we had no beer my ah decided to take his tomorrow liquor next door. I dont get mad. I dont even say anything. At this point ive learned to not care too much about his decisions and let him learn.
They drink outside and are probably gone for about an two hours before they both show up inside. Ah tells me the neighbors wife is mad so the husband is getting away a bit by hanging at our place. I dont say anything or argue. I figure itll pass hell leave and thatll be that.
Mind you apparently the wife was drinking with them so my ah tells me.
In short maybe ten minutes pass and the neighbor decides to go talk to his wife... (yes good idea!) BUT my ah wants to tag along with him (ughhhh what?!...drunk thinking right? Because in no way should he have even gone with him. Let them talk!)
So im sitting outside having a smoke and I hear a loud BANG and "you f****** a**h***"
I run inside to go to the front but as soon as I do my ah walks in and tells me the neighbors were bickering and the husband kicked their door in.
Aside from that I heard complaining from ah about the wife calling my husband a bad influence and him trying to tell the husband to stop before it got to that point.
Ah says hes never going to hang out with him again. I wish he would justvsee that thats what alcohol drugs etc do to people and that "mindframe" where people do not use their heads and act responsible but thats not going to happen yet. He was trying to tell me that alcohol had nothing to do with it....hell probably wake up tomorrow after he sobers up and think differently. I dont know but it was a crazy night.
Ps rehab still in the picture but thanks to corporate bs and red tape we have yet to see the pay raise on check and still many finances to catch up on.
Thought ide share my latest experience but im keeping my composure. Im not trying to control any aspects of his future recovery or drinking.
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
Hey now dollydo I cant control how someone else lives or that they drink. This was all my neighbors doing.
Though my ah was drinking he made the poor choice hang out with them (which rarely ever happens)
And thats his decision and a poor one but I nor my children were involved in it. My children were in their beds and I had no part in what was said or done and my ah was just as upset as me about their argument.
Though my ah was drinking he made the poor choice hang out with them (which rarely ever happens)
And thats his decision and a poor one but I nor my children were involved in it. My children were in their beds and I had no part in what was said or done and my ah was just as upset as me about their argument.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Good job not engaging in this craziness.
With alcoholic neighbor kicking in the door, don't hesitate to call 911 for any sounds of violence over there. Whether wife is drinking or not, his kicking in the door indicates a potential for violence.
With alcoholic neighbor kicking in the door, don't hesitate to call 911 for any sounds of violence over there. Whether wife is drinking or not, his kicking in the door indicates a potential for violence.
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
Originally Posted by LexieCat 
Good job not engaging in this craziness.
With alcoholic neighbor kicking in the door, don't hesitate to call 911 for any sounds of violence over there. Whether wife is drinking or not, his kicking in the door indicates a potential for violence.
With alcoholic neighbor kicking in the door, don't hesitate to call 911 for any sounds of violence over there. Whether wife is drinking or not, his kicking in the door indicates a potential for violence.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,038
Hey lonely girl,
Glad you could detach and that no one got hurt. Don't recall your children's ages. But I have a 12 year old who was a lot more aware of AH's alcoholic doings - day and night - when she was little, than I ever thought she was Who knows what they overhear.
Also, I would be concerned that your neighbor or his wife, mixed up with AH, could have another incident worse than this.
Personally, my AH never codrank at our place - but I wouldn't allow it. If my AH and the neighbors were swearing and fighting I would call the police. In fact, you could probably call the police now.
Maybe I sound alarmist to you, but I have been living with escalating alcoholic trouble and believe me, the children are impacted by everything we are. When I am traumatized, shocked, anxious, scared - they are feeling it, too. My 6 year old may notunderstand what is going on, but she feels what I feel more than anyone.
((( HUGS )))
Glad you could detach and that no one got hurt. Don't recall your children's ages. But I have a 12 year old who was a lot more aware of AH's alcoholic doings - day and night - when she was little, than I ever thought she was Who knows what they overhear.
Also, I would be concerned that your neighbor or his wife, mixed up with AH, could have another incident worse than this.
Personally, my AH never codrank at our place - but I wouldn't allow it. If my AH and the neighbors were swearing and fighting I would call the police. In fact, you could probably call the police now.
Maybe I sound alarmist to you, but I have been living with escalating alcoholic trouble and believe me, the children are impacted by everything we are. When I am traumatized, shocked, anxious, scared - they are feeling it, too. My 6 year old may notunderstand what is going on, but she feels what I feel more than anyone.
((( HUGS )))
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,038
P.S. also, and especially - when we get so used to crazy and violence we learn to banalise it - so do they. So they potentially grow up thinking swearing, driving drunk, kicking in doors - all that is normal. And where does that leave them as adults. Ready to accept or perpetuate unacceptable behavior.
Careful.
Careful.
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
I was not suggesting that you engage. This crap is all part of living with an addict, been there, doesn't seem to bother you,that is good. But, it will have an impact on your children, they don't sleep 24 hours a day they feel, hear and see everything, that includes your neighbors drunkin nonsense. Me, I would have called 911, as long as they feel that they can get away with disrupting the neighborhood, they will.
We all walk our own path in life, I sincerely hope yours gets you to where you want to be.
We all walk our own path in life, I sincerely hope yours gets you to where you want to be.
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
I agree . Luckily this was the only occurence I have even heard of getting like that so I know if I dont see hear or know then neither do my children. So to my knowledge something like the door incident had only happened the one time and frankly their property their business. I have never seen or heard any violence from them but for that night and it was over as soon as it started. From my knowledge. I am blessed though that despite that my ah handed it very well and then decided to keep his distance from it all together. He thinks now its best to just keep them on their side of the fence. Though he insisted if he got too much he would call the police. I am glad the situation was short lived ide rather not have too or for thst matter be in anyway involved in others problems. Ive got my own but yes I understood from your comment that you werent insisting on involving myself but taking a step back and seeing how chaotic that is for everyone including my kids.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 1,423
Yuck.
I wouldn't let the neighbour in your house at all especially with your child there.
I would also encourage your AH not to mix with him but see you are doing well detaching so you may not want to suggest that?
Not a healthy lifestyle at moment.
Hang in there.
Hugs.:ghug3
I wouldn't let the neighbour in your house at all especially with your child there.
I would also encourage your AH not to mix with him but see you are doing well detaching so you may not want to suggest that?
Not a healthy lifestyle at moment.
Hang in there.
Hugs.:ghug3
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
Originally Posted by Rosiepetal
Yuck.
I wouldn't let the neighbour in your house at all especially with your child there.
I would also encourage your AH not to mix with him but see you are doing well detaching so you may not want to suggest that?
Not a healthy lifestyle at moment.
Hang in there.
Hugs.:ghug3
I wouldn't let the neighbour in your house at all especially with your child there.
I would also encourage your AH not to mix with him but see you are doing well detaching so you may not want to suggest that?
Not a healthy lifestyle at moment.
Hang in there.
Hugs.:ghug3
Ah is keeping distance on his own. Hes made it clear to me that he doesnt want to mix with them again. No reason to get into trouble or otherwise for someone elses behaviour and hes been avoiding them. So im atleast glad that though im leaving his decisions to him...hes makingbthe right ones of course he has a road ahead of him. I dont know if you read but we are still waiying on the oay raise. Its absolutely frustrating but ah has said as soon as we get our finances in order with this raise he will get into a program and with that....maybe the situation with the neighbors was a god send? I mean had that not happened drunk or sober he wouldnt see the negativity that they have and may risk any future recovery?
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