lizatola

And, I think that is the lesson you are learning, albeit a difficult lesson, right? If it hadn't been the XABF for you, it would have been someone else. I think we are given our life lessons to help us become better people, to help us learn to love ourselves. Until we love ourselves, we can't love others in a way that is true to ourselves and to them, and until we have our eyes opened by our experiences we can't fix it. If we don't know what's wrong, we won't have the tools or the ability to fix it.

I once remember a story from a friend of mine: she and her family kept getting sick and couldn't figure out why. Finally another friend suggested she check her house for black mold. A company came and found a leak in her A/C unit in the attic and found a LOT Of black mold. It cost them thousands to fix, put them out of their home for months, etc. But, in the end, her family got healthy. The sinus infections, the unexplained muscle pains and weakness, dizziness, etc were gone because they exposed the problem and fixed it.

I was talking to my aunt recently and she kept reminding me that our path is right. There's nothing wrong with where we are today. It's all happening for a reason and if we sit around and question it until we're blue in the face, how is that going to make it better? She is my mom's sister and like a second mother to me and she's a very spiritual woman, but she wasn't always like that. She used to be a screaming angry woman whom I was sometimes scared of. She was married to an abusive workaholic who sent her to the hospital twice because of his abuse. He cheated on her and left her with 2 pre teen girls and she was devastated. Yet, 20 years later she says it's the best thing that happened to her. She was free. And, she's used these years to learn about who she really is and she's done a beautiful job of passing her lessons on to my cousins and to me and my sister. My son has commented on her like this, "Aunt Kathy is always so happy and at peace. I love spending time with her, even if she is a bit strange at times." LOL, I love that my son sees her as a light, he doesn't know her as I did in the past.

Hang in there, Ziggy. Your lessons are unfolding for you! HUGS!