O/T - Boundaries: aggressive texting (and communication)
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Join Date: Jun 2012
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O/T - Boundaries: aggressive texting (and communication)
I have a friend who I believe is an addict; he tells me about mixing ambien and beers, how much he thinks about drinking, etc., and he exhibits many of the behaviors I've seen in other alcoholics I've been involved with (lord help me.)
So, this friend used to text me a lot, dozens a day while I was work and in the evenings, or in the middle of the night if he couldn't sleep. I was never left alone and I became annoyed as hell. After he did 5-6 d*ckhead things to me over the course of a month or so, I finally did tell him I needed time and space. His actions were continuously contrary to what he was saying about how important our friendship was. I learned in my marriage (after the fact haha) to an alcoholic that actions matter, and my friend's kind words were not backed up with corresponding action.
This is not the first time I've had aggressive texts/IMs/phone calls from an A. I guess I never said "stop" b/c I was worried about their feelings more than mine. So, what is a clear boundary to set when I receive aggressive communications in the future, regardless if he/she is an A?
So, this friend used to text me a lot, dozens a day while I was work and in the evenings, or in the middle of the night if he couldn't sleep. I was never left alone and I became annoyed as hell. After he did 5-6 d*ckhead things to me over the course of a month or so, I finally did tell him I needed time and space. His actions were continuously contrary to what he was saying about how important our friendship was. I learned in my marriage (after the fact haha) to an alcoholic that actions matter, and my friend's kind words were not backed up with corresponding action.
This is not the first time I've had aggressive texts/IMs/phone calls from an A. I guess I never said "stop" b/c I was worried about their feelings more than mine. So, what is a clear boundary to set when I receive aggressive communications in the future, regardless if he/she is an A?
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Join Date: Apr 2008
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You can start by saying "STOP." If that doesn't work, block them from your phone/email. If you want that nonsense to stop, you are going to have to be the one to put an end to it.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
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Tonight on the evening news, they presented an article about Ambien. They have determined that Ambien stays in a person's system much longer than they originally thought. They compared the next day effects of Ambien to drunk driving. So add alcohol and I am sure he is quite buzzed up.
I would be very clear and say please stop calling me/texting me excessively, and in the middle of the night. If you cannot respect my wishes than I no longer see a reason for our friendship to continue. Afterall, isn't friendship built on MUTUAL respect?
I would be very clear and say please stop calling me/texting me excessively, and in the middle of the night. If you cannot respect my wishes than I no longer see a reason for our friendship to continue. Afterall, isn't friendship built on MUTUAL respect?
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