Anon12

I was so dreading the Christmas holiday as it was my first since splitting up with my XABF six months ago. I was thinking through what I would say if my X texted me to wish me happy christmas or new year, but I never thought I wouldn't hear anything. So when I had no message on christmas day and no message on new year's day, I found it really painful and I've found myself in tears this week.

I know it's perverse as I know no contact is better for me but it feels like the last five and a half years counted for nothing. I've told myself that maybe he didn't go home to his parents and he was drunk but the overwhelming feeling is I am just not important enough to be even on his radar now. He's moved on and I don't even warrant a friendly Christmas message. And that really hurts still. I'm so glad I didn't write any letter that I'd talked about before Chirstmas as I'd feel really rejected now if I had.

I've made lots of plans to try and move on - I've bought a new camera and booked myself on a workshop to learn how to use it. I've also joined a camera group that meet monthly. I know I'll get there but just feel really sad today so just wanted to vent and appreciate any encouragement.

Thanks for reading.

Sungrl

No more contact= no more hurt. You are doing great. Enjoy your new hobby and to hell with him.

dollydo

I am sorry that you are in pain, however, I do believe in the long run, it is for the best.

Enjoy your new hobby, and share your pics with us!

Thepatman

"Don't sit down and wait for the opportunities to come, you have to get up and make them happen"

I love this dollydo. So true!

RedCandle

I went through the same thing...

I thought, even though we are not on good terms....SURELY on Christmas he will text or email....something....

And then Christmas passed.
So then I thought...SURELY on NEW YEARS there will be something.

But nothing happened on New Years either.
It hurt. A lot.
Granted, I didn't exactly reach out either...but it still hurt.

We haven't communicated now for 3 weeks.

I don't have any advice...but I did want to say that you are not alone.

brokenrose

Me three! I am in the exact same boat..its been over 2 months that he left me and I thought well maybe he will text at Christmas, maybe for New Year's.....nothing. I guess he is really gone for good this time, but the more time goes by, the more I'm starting to think, maybe it is for the best....being alone sucks, but being with an alcoholic sucked too. We will get better, little by little, have faith. Hugs!

cr995

I So - know how you are feeling. I used to check my emails constantly and even though I dreaded getting an abusive one - it still hurt to get nothing! No acknowledgement I existed after 3 decades together. But I'm learning that they really are not normal people. I can't tell you what to do - except you are not alone. ((Hugs))