ragingspouse

Well my last post was my AH going off to rehab. He returned home after Thanksgiving and we agreed that if he would continue to do his aftercare and go to meeting that I would be willing to also work on our marriage.

I honestly would like to know what happened to him in treatment. Its like they unscrewed his head. His thought pattern is completely wacked out. A normal conversation somehow get twisted to the point of me looking at him with a dumbfounded look on my face. He also has slipped into a deep depression and is not taking the medication he was prescribed because he does not like the side effects. Add that with a very short fuse.... not happy times here. He will go to work come home and sit in the bedroom and sulk all night.

I have tried to help him through the depression as i have been there myself and understand that much of it. But he is now a blubbering 38 yr with a temper. He is seeing both a counselor and psychiatrist but is not doing as they advise or has them so snowed that they cant help him. I have attended some of his counseling session with him and when I am there he just sits there.

These last few months I have made the choice to take care of me and the kids and let him deal with him. I started going out with my friends again, doing things with the kids more and not really thinking about his issues because thats not my concern anymore. But he sees it as ME becoming a selfish b*&^h and not caring anymore.

It came to blows again today.... and I finally said what I have been thinking for the last few months... its over. Im not happy he is not happy its time to let go.

20yrs is a long time to be with someone but I dont think either of us can truly heal from this by being together. I just hope that we can do this in a civil matter rather than it getting ugly

Pelican

Only you can decide when you have had enough. If you feel like you are done, then you are done.

I learned something here about getting divorced from an addict: Prepare for the worst while still hoping for the best.