Kassie2

Last year I was just coming out the worst of my life. This year my life has turn around so much that I just had to make a list and I encourage others to take a turn as well.

This year I am thankful to have the son and daughter that I have.
I am thankful they are doing well and responsibly independent and still think to check on me.
I am thankful to have control over my own life and time and to feel really great about it.
I am thankful to have had the support at the work place to turn a bad situation into a good one.
I am thankful for a new beginning at an old, familiar place, where I am loved and respected by my friends.
I am thankful for my worship place, the amazing supportive community and the opportunity to return to a leadership position.
I still have my home and I can pay my bills.
I no longer carry around shame, guilt and fear.
I have my health and get to stretch my wings at new activities and make new connections.

I realize I go on longer and that is another thing I am thankful for this year.

Please share your list with me and others here. I know from the past that it can feel hard to find these feelings so whatever you can share it will be appreciated all the more.

Happy Thanksgiving Day.

owathu

Last year at this time my sister just got out of a horrid relationship with a Narcissist, who drank waaay too much, all the time. This year, she most likely met her soul-mate. She tells me that she was exactly where I was last year, devastated, broken but getting stronger each day.

She decided, screw it, I am just going to live my life exactly how I want it. If there is to be another man in my life, his ass better show up at my front door. She bought a house, a man showed up at her front door to redo her bathroom. He turned out to be funny, kind, loving, a person who enjoys a glass of wine here and there (in other words, a normal person who enjoys wine when appropriate), mature, and has the best smile and sense of humor.

She worked on herself, let the damage go, and the Universe provided her with her true mate.

I am thankful that my big sis is in love. When I didn't think she was able to do it again, here came her "Prince". And, he is a sweetheart. I couldn't be happier for her, and I am thankful that I have an example of someone who went through it, got to the other side, and came out of it thanking the Universe that she let that bad man go. Because, it shows us all, let it go, the Universe has something else in mind.

Last year at this time? She wouldn't have known the joy that she is now experiencing. And I am not saying that a partner is the end all be all, and she certainly would have been completely content single for the rest of her life, but, damnit, I am so happy for her that she found her mate.

That is what I am thankful for. (And also that I don't have to deal with my AH's family this year! ;op)

amooseoncebitmysister

Thanks for this topic. I'm in pain so it feels good to make my brain switch from sad/grieving to gratitude for what I do have!

Bear with me for a paragraph. No rosy glasses here, just the facts. Thanksgivings have *always* been really great for me and my AH. It was the only period of time that he remained sober, charming, and happy, and it was pretty wonderful between us, as it was when we first fell for each other; it was a 15 year tradition. We went to a cabin in the woods every Thanksgiving with my brother and his family and all of our dogs. He smoked the turkey on the grill and I did most of the rest of the cooking. We'd make pies together (he makes a great crust); we had a blast goofing off in the kitchen. A lot of fierce Scrabble playing too.

THIS year, he is currently in a psychiatric unit after being suicidal last Monday. From my apartment, I called the police for a welfare check; they arrived and thought he was high risk, so took him to the hospital. In handcuffs. I never thought about it and was taken aback when he told me he was brought in wearing handcuffs.

Even though I know I cannot control or cure my broken husband or his alcoholism, it is nonetheless very sad and I am grieving for him and the loss of the good us at Thanksgiving. I've been holding on, letting the pain wash over, and continuing to be constructive and living life.

I am grateful that I have the strength to do that, thanks to my therapist, this board, Alanon, and the incredible friends I am so fortunate to have. I am grateful to see the silver lining of the pain and misery of being married to an alcoholic, which is that one can grow from the experience in a very profound and positive way and even be happy. I am grateful for the internal and external peace I mostly have. I am even grateful for the opportunity to do something completely different for Thanksgiving this year.

I am grateful to the people who come here and share experience and hope and encouragement. It is truly comforting. Happy Thanksgiving.

ps I'm grateful for my doggos kitties and the 4-legged Tonbeast too.