i need some advice
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
i need some advice
has anyone else felt like this?
i finally came home today and im proud to say my ah looks amazing and so far so good but he really did "clean" house like he said he was ie complete turn around. closet space ...clutter gone am so happy . i feel he did it to impress me but i felt this ouch " i should have done that.. " feeling. i know it doesnt make sense but could this be that im just nervous because im happy but fearful to think how long will it last? like hes turning around and what if he stops? i just mean that i was the only one who really cleaned and catered to him and now hes being normal loving and hes cleaning!! is this just like shell shock because its different. ive been gone the longest weve been apart in years and ive stoid my ground harder i have before and in 11-12 (i lose count lol) days time he has been running. hes been to aa. hes been cleaning and taking care of things and hes even bought things for the house that he thought i would like and yea...ive had moments or a day of sobteity from him but i can see it when i saw him today. hes really sober and hes what i have been waiting for and now that its here....im shocked but cautious and take back by this. knock on wood i really hope it stays like this but ive been so use to it....i just feel like a fish out of water. not bad but just new.
i finally came home today and im proud to say my ah looks amazing and so far so good but he really did "clean" house like he said he was ie complete turn around. closet space ...clutter gone am so happy . i feel he did it to impress me but i felt this ouch " i should have done that.. " feeling. i know it doesnt make sense but could this be that im just nervous because im happy but fearful to think how long will it last? like hes turning around and what if he stops? i just mean that i was the only one who really cleaned and catered to him and now hes being normal loving and hes cleaning!! is this just like shell shock because its different. ive been gone the longest weve been apart in years and ive stoid my ground harder i have before and in 11-12 (i lose count lol) days time he has been running. hes been to aa. hes been cleaning and taking care of things and hes even bought things for the house that he thought i would like and yea...ive had moments or a day of sobteity from him but i can see it when i saw him today. hes really sober and hes what i have been waiting for and now that its here....im shocked but cautious and take back by this. knock on wood i really hope it stays like this but ive been so use to it....i just feel like a fish out of water. not bad but just new.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 3,443
Just take one day at a time and take care not to go future tripping.
Continue to work your own recovery and leave him to his. Working on your own recovery is the key. That is something that will directly impact you, and that you have direct control over.
Continue to work your own recovery and leave him to his. Working on your own recovery is the key. That is something that will directly impact you, and that you have direct control over.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 106
Thislonelygirl,
I am almost exactly where you are. My (R)AH just got laid off and is home all day. Saturday, I brought home boxes to move out after his relapse. He did all the promising, etc. that they do. He is now going to AA everyday (got a new starting chip), is getting back into his woodshop (had ignored it for months) and is not acting like the person he has been for the last coupld of years, but instead is acting like the person I fell in love with. And yes, it's scary to think about that "other shoe dropping" like it always seems to.
Thumper is right. Take it one day at a time and be grateful for that day. Tomorrow will take care of itself. But know that you aren't alone!
I am almost exactly where you are. My (R)AH just got laid off and is home all day. Saturday, I brought home boxes to move out after his relapse. He did all the promising, etc. that they do. He is now going to AA everyday (got a new starting chip), is getting back into his woodshop (had ignored it for months) and is not acting like the person he has been for the last coupld of years, but instead is acting like the person I fell in love with. And yes, it's scary to think about that "other shoe dropping" like it always seems to.
Thumper is right. Take it one day at a time and be grateful for that day. Tomorrow will take care of itself. But know that you aren't alone!
box of chocolates
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,013
hes doing so good. so far. it feels like a dream...were going on a date tomorrow too i mean seriously!?( you couldnt imagine the last time we went on a date night just me and him) before i wouldnt want to go anywhere woth him of fear hed drunk or crave drinking ie grumpy. it was just a bummer going out before and now instead of drinking first its like me and him first. thats amazing to me but as i said its new its just a shock and so many emotions with it. thanks for the responses i just needed to hear others on this and if im being ...i dunno crazy lol
i will continue to seek my recovery. i obviously need too
i will continue to seek my recovery. i obviously need too
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