My First Al-Anon Meeting?
 

So today I went to my first Al-Anon meeting. Or so I thought.

There is a building specifically for this stuff by my house. I went into the wrong room, it turned out to be AA instead.

So I stayed. Why not? A guy I work with was there, and I was nervous as hell. So I stayed, listened, did all that stuff. The topic was Step 1.

Now I wonder if I may have an alcohol problem. I know I have an anger problem, I get mad and drink. Due to the issues these past few weeks, I have been always angry, and therefore, always drunk. Everything bad that has happened in my life (not EVERYthing, but a lot) has happened when I was drunk. Therefore it would not have happened had I been sober. I continue to drink anyway, knowing the consequences.

I have been sober for 18 days. Friday, 9/28/12, I woke up shaking, and scared the living $hit out of me because all I could think of was turning into the ABF. I ALWAYS drink to get drunk, and I NEVER know how or when to stop.

I am not asking you guys if you think I have a problem. I think I do, or at the very least, I will if I don't get this under control.

I really am not trying to label myself as an alcoholic, I have all kinds of labels on me already, and another one will probably break me.

I was doing this to find a home group. Now it's something else entirely.

There is another meeting tomorrow night. I am going. I will eventually make sure I get to the Al-Anon meeting, though.

Both programs are designed to help you become a more serene, healthy, individual. Both programs teach you skills to face life on life's terms.

This forum has a lot of members that are considered double winners. Double winners are folks that have overcome their personal chemical addiction as well as working on their personal recovery from living with another person's addictions. In fact, I am one of the double winners.

My personal recommendation, based on my experience, would be to focus on your own alcoholism first. Focus on taking away a chemical addiction that is preventing you from facing your anger issue. Then you will be clear minded and able to face the deeper issues that are driving your anger.

I think your HP put you in the right place at the right time. :grouphug:

I thought my problems were about my XBF (I hesitate to say ABF because he doesn't think he is an A) at the time too. I also feared that I was getting sucked into that world. I started going to a group and realized that my problems are my problems, not his or anyone else's for that matter. It's been almost 6 months since my last drink and I am very happy I made this decision...for me. He chose not to acknowledge his problems with drinking or with his anger. I broke things off at the end of July because I saw that I liked this life - even alone - more than I did the life I had with him drinking to excess. Congratulations for staying at the meeting and I hope you find what you are looking for there!

Oh...I had someone from work show up in my group as well...at first I wanted to hurl and then I realized he was there for the same reason. I see him occassionally at work now and I don't feel awkward at all...can't say if he feels the same. :)

Though I'm don't completely buy into the "everything happens for a reason" stuff, sometimes they do, very cool, best wishes.

My precise thoughts. Great stuff for you inpieces314!

Sorry it has been a while. Busy going to meetings, you know the drill.

I am on vacation this week and I have yet to relax at all.

If the lack of relaxing is due to going to meetings, that's all right! :)

Yeah, partly.

They are kind of far from my house, out of state, whatever. I like them because they are in a building just for this purpose. They have meetings all day and all night. I went to a 6:30 meeting last night, and they had an 8:00 meeting right after that, and NA at 8:00 too. It's pretty cool.

You are doing awesome!! :)

Congratulations. You are doing great. Alanon has really helped me learn to live a far more peaceful life. I am more able to understand my RAH.

Double winner here too InPieces. How is it going?