October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month
To thine own self be true.
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Here is a link to their web site for information: National Domestic Violence Hotline
Here are the phone numbers for help from the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE (7233) or TTY 1−800−787−3224
Here is an article to help us identify the red flags of abuse:
Know the Red Flags of AbuseIt’s not always easy to tell at the beginning of a relationship if it will become abusive.
In fact, many abusers may seem absolutely perfect on the surface– as if they are the dream partner — in the early stages of a relationship. Possessive and controlling behaviors don’t always appear overnight, but rather emerge and intensify as the relationship grows.
If you’re beginning to feel as if your partner or a loved one’s partner is becoming abusive, there are a few behaviors that you can look out for. Watch out for these red flags and if you’re experiencing one or more of them in your relationship, call The Hotline to talk about what’s going on:
-Embarrassing or putting you down
-Looking at you or acting in ways that scare you
-Controlling who you see, where you go, or what you do
-Keeping you or discouraging you from seeing your friends or families
-Taking your money or refusing to give you money for expenses
-Preventing you from making your own decisions
-Telling you that you are a bad parent or threatening to harm or take away your children
-Preventing you from working or attending school
-Blaming you for the abuse, or acting like it’s not really happening
-Destroying your property or threatening to hurt or kill your pets
-Intimidating you with guns, knives or other weapons
-Shoving, slapping, choking or hitting you
-Attempting to stop you from pressing charges
-Threatening to commit suicide because of something you’ve done
-Threatening to hurt or kill you
-Pressuring you to have sex when you don’t want to or do things sexually you’re not comfortable with
-Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol
-Preventing you from using birth control or pressuring you to become pregnant when you’re not ready
Domestic violence doesn’t look the same in every relationship because every relationship is different. But one thing most abusive relationships have in common is that the abusive partner does many different kinds of things to have more power and control over their partners.
If you’re concerned about some of these things happening in your relationship, please feel free to give us a call at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Here are the phone numbers for help from the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE (7233) or TTY 1−800−787−3224
Here is an article to help us identify the red flags of abuse:
Know the Red Flags of AbuseIt’s not always easy to tell at the beginning of a relationship if it will become abusive.
In fact, many abusers may seem absolutely perfect on the surface– as if they are the dream partner — in the early stages of a relationship. Possessive and controlling behaviors don’t always appear overnight, but rather emerge and intensify as the relationship grows.
If you’re beginning to feel as if your partner or a loved one’s partner is becoming abusive, there are a few behaviors that you can look out for. Watch out for these red flags and if you’re experiencing one or more of them in your relationship, call The Hotline to talk about what’s going on:
-Embarrassing or putting you down
-Looking at you or acting in ways that scare you
-Controlling who you see, where you go, or what you do
-Keeping you or discouraging you from seeing your friends or families
-Taking your money or refusing to give you money for expenses
-Preventing you from making your own decisions
-Telling you that you are a bad parent or threatening to harm or take away your children
-Preventing you from working or attending school
-Blaming you for the abuse, or acting like it’s not really happening
-Destroying your property or threatening to hurt or kill your pets
-Intimidating you with guns, knives or other weapons
-Shoving, slapping, choking or hitting you
-Attempting to stop you from pressing charges
-Threatening to commit suicide because of something you’ve done
-Threatening to hurt or kill you
-Pressuring you to have sex when you don’t want to or do things sexually you’re not comfortable with
-Pressuring you to use drugs or alcohol
-Preventing you from using birth control or pressuring you to become pregnant when you’re not ready
Domestic violence doesn’t look the same in every relationship because every relationship is different. But one thing most abusive relationships have in common is that the abusive partner does many different kinds of things to have more power and control over their partners.
If you’re concerned about some of these things happening in your relationship, please feel free to give us a call at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 78
It is indeed important to reiterate how domestic violence comes in all forms, as do the victims of it. The stigma used to make me conjure up an image of a pathetic mousey tiny housewife with no self-esteem. (I'm still struggling with the term "co-dependent" for the same reason.) But I'm 6 feet tall, fit and strong, have a college degree and a high-paying job! Surely no one can push me around!
But every time the police would come to the house to haul my alcoholic away, a social worker came the next day to give me a brochure with a similar checklist. It took at least 4 brochures before I finally read down the list and made the checks. And I made A LOT of checks... It was a total WTF moment!
There is no shame in finding yourself at the business end of a relationship with an abuser, no matter who you are. Special note to the abused men out there too. No shame...
But every time the police would come to the house to haul my alcoholic away, a social worker came the next day to give me a brochure with a similar checklist. It took at least 4 brochures before I finally read down the list and made the checks. And I made A LOT of checks... It was a total WTF moment!
There is no shame in finding yourself at the business end of a relationship with an abuser, no matter who you are. Special note to the abused men out there too. No shame...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
There is no shame in finding yourself at the business end of a relationship with an abuser, no matter who you are. Special note to the abused men out there too. No shame...
The shame of being a victim is what keeps many from seeking help.
My emotional baggage
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 285
Abuse is like a bruise that really won't go away. It hurts and you will do everything in your power to hide it.
If you are in an abusive relationship, know that you don't deserve it and that there are better things out there for you.
The best thing I ever did for myself and my kids was to stop keeping the secrets. I didn't ask for it, or cause it. It is his shame to carry not mine.
If you are in an abusive relationship, know that you don't deserve it and that there are better things out there for you.
The best thing I ever did for myself and my kids was to stop keeping the secrets. I didn't ask for it, or cause it. It is his shame to carry not mine.
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