Just when I thought it was over
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Austin
Posts: 31
Just when I thought it was over
As much as I don't like my mom sometimes, I do worry for her. Her mother was an alcoholic, and her Aunt (my Great-Aunt) is an embittered woman that no one has heard from in years, almost a decade really.
Until today...
We don't know what brought her to this decision, but my Great Aunt has decided to move closer to family... and that family being us. She wants to spend her last days with whatever family she has left after being disowned by her son and his entire family, by her ex-husband and his entire family, and also by my mom and our entire family.
She's not an A, but she has these really mean characteristics and blatant disregard for boundaries that are akin to how an angry A would treat a codie... Anyways, the only reason I'm even posting about this is that I don't know what to tell my mom or how to help her. She has severe codie tendencies, and I'm afraid that if she doesn't arm herself with the tools of a good program NOW, she'll just get sucked into this cycle of self-hatred...
Is there anyone that knows what I'm talking about? What would You do?
Basically, the mother who made my relative's life so terrible that it drove him to drink will now be living within our city limits and my mom is already overreacting about her moving here (and we haven't even seen her yet)
Until today...
We don't know what brought her to this decision, but my Great Aunt has decided to move closer to family... and that family being us. She wants to spend her last days with whatever family she has left after being disowned by her son and his entire family, by her ex-husband and his entire family, and also by my mom and our entire family.
She's not an A, but she has these really mean characteristics and blatant disregard for boundaries that are akin to how an angry A would treat a codie... Anyways, the only reason I'm even posting about this is that I don't know what to tell my mom or how to help her. She has severe codie tendencies, and I'm afraid that if she doesn't arm herself with the tools of a good program NOW, she'll just get sucked into this cycle of self-hatred...
Is there anyone that knows what I'm talking about? What would You do?
Basically, the mother who made my relative's life so terrible that it drove him to drink will now be living within our city limits and my mom is already overreacting about her moving here (and we haven't even seen her yet)
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 26
I agree that your mom needs to find a way to handle this, but how does that affect you? Do you live with your mom? Is it possible that you can prevent yourself from seeing this woman?
As we all are learning, you can only control your actions, not the actions of others. If your mon is determined to be a Codie with nasty aunt, that's her decision. But it doesn't mean you have to as well.
As we all are learning, you can only control your actions, not the actions of others. If your mon is determined to be a Codie with nasty aunt, that's her decision. But it doesn't mean you have to as well.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: new moon road
Posts: 1,545
I agree with the other posters and also want to add that your Great Aunt's Higher Power and your mother's Higher Power may know something you can't see. Sometimes people need to come back together and sometimes things which look like catastrophes in the making turn out to have a gift for those involved.
As people age, they change, even your Great Aunt, and I would just step back and silently bless everyone involved (you, too) and place the situation in the care of the Divine. If she arrives in town, she is meant to be there.
As people age, they change, even your Great Aunt, and I would just step back and silently bless everyone involved (you, too) and place the situation in the care of the Divine. If she arrives in town, she is meant to be there.
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