I'm ending it with my boyfriend
 

His 27 year old daughter is an alcoholic. She nearly died from a serious seizure last month and was in the hospital 5 days. She's moved back into her Dads home. At first he was all about getting her into rehab. Found out insurance won't cover it. So they are doing nothing. She clearly doesn't want to get sober and with no job, no money, just living back at his house- freeloading off Dad and taking over the house-which has moved me out. I didn't live with him, just spent lots of time there. He is now 5 days a week out of town for school pursuing a degree.

I tried to explain to him the situation with her at home and not getting help ruins our relationship. He doesn't get it and thinks I should just go along with it. I told him I won't be part of enabling and codependent relationships. He can't see the situation or doesn't want to. His priority is to just get this last school year done. How sad. With him gone so muchI see her having her alcoholic friends over again and continued distruction. Maybe shell kill herself this time. Every time she did this things were broken and destroyed,: she got into my personal things- I showed up one day to see her wearing my dress! I took all my things out of the house then.

I'm so sad about it all. I thought a 57 year old man would have it more together than this. We were just dating 7 months so I'm out now and taking care of me. But ouch. :c021:

http://www.bleepmybrainsays.com/wp-c...7/bullseye.jpg

You communicated. You established what your boundary would be. You took a stand. You are living with the consequences. GOOD FOR YOU!

Give him time to "get it." His daughter is his little girl. He has to "get" that she's an alcoholic, come to terms with and accept that. He has to "get" that you're more important in his life than an active alcoholic (or the end of the school year).

If he doesn't "come around," is that someone with whom you want to be anyway? Literally "come around" too.

Thank you...
 

That's right. If he can't come around he's not the person I thought he was and I don't want to be with someone like that. I've been through so much and I am now at a point in my life I value myself by making the tough choices and realize I'm worthy of more.

I guess my question is- is there anything else I can do?

I've never been so close to an addiction issue before although I have had friends who have taught me by their experiences.

Good for you! :)

As for your question: Go to an Al-Anon meeting. Read the stickies at the top of this Forum. Read "Codependent No More" by Melodie Beattie so you'll see how well you're doing (and what to avoid doing) as compared to some of us who have endured and are enduring so much from these relationships with As. Go to an Al-Anon meeting; I can't emphasize that enough because a face-to-face has something special, extra to give you! Peace. :)

Thanks! Good suggestions. I will. :thanks

You're doing it now.