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All moved in at our new home-AH "suddenly" has a new "friend"

Old 09-13-2012, 03:52 AM
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All moved in at our new home-AH "suddenly" has a new "friend"

Hi all,

We moved last Friday, myself and my son. We found a lovely place and there is a a neighbor boy the same age as my son and they get along great! There have been challenges and stresses-(like this morning we have no water!). But overall, things are good here. I still get texts about how much AH misses me and how he wishes things weren't this way, that he loves me, blah blah blah.

Well, I get a phone call from my friend and neighbor from the old house with AH. She says she was driving home from somewhere and saw him walking to the old house with a young woman and he was pushing a bicycle. She stopped to say hello (and to see what was happening there) and after saying hello, asked who his friend was. She said he seemed to be slurring his words and didn't really answer her. She said that she could not resist saying that "this is no way to get your wife back".

When she called me, she just was outraged and shocked that I was not outraged. I explained that I expected it and that he had been on craigs list for a couple of months apparently seeking my replacement. I am not surprised.

Thanks SR for getting me this far in my recovery! In the past, I would have called and who knows what drama would have happened. But like I told my friend, I moved so that I did not have to live in this drama anymore and that I have no desire to call. He will choose what he chooses. I am out of it--thank God!

Right now, I have been so busy that I have not had time to really process anything. My son is sleeping with me since it is a new house and he is not quite ready to sleep in his new room without me etc. So I don't even have that time of day to have my reflection time. But I am noticing that I feel a little depressed. Even though I expected it all, I was waivering in my thinking, and feeling a bit sorry for him because of all his quacking. Then I hear about this woman and I had a wake up call that my thinking is so messed up.

Wow, this is going to be a long road.
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Old 09-13-2012, 03:55 AM
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Just like my AH, yours found/or is looking for someone who will be fine with his drinking. This is not about you, or how you failed (you didn't) but about him and how he is failing himself.

You are on the path for your own recovery and peace. Keep putting one foot in front of the other.
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Old 09-13-2012, 04:01 AM
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Its impossible to ride a bicycle if you are drunk. Think how ridicules he is!
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Old 09-13-2012, 04:13 AM
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I think the bicycle is his new friend's. He told me about her when he was telling me about one of his AA meetings and told me there was a girl there that road her bike to all the meetings.

And yup, I am trudging along one step at time. I just keep telling myself just keep doing that. But I am just so bone weary tired that it is hard.
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