bamboo10

For the night at least.i just couldn't do it. I checked into a hotel. I don't know what to do. I feel completely alone. I feel unlovable and alone. I

kewlgurl

You are NOT alone! ****{HUGS}}} Dealing with someone else's addiction can be completely overwhelming and unbearable, not to mention frustrating and infuriating! Think of your own needs now and do what is in your best interest. Know we are here for you!

PeacefulMe

We at SR are here. You are not alone and we love you.

fulloffaith

So sorry you are feeling sad....you are not alone. All of us here have been through the hard and challenging ups and downs of loving someone with an addiction. Take care of YOU. Be kind to yourself. Sometimes the very hardest part is realizing that being involved is hurting ourselves. All you can help is you. hugs your way - stay strong!

seek

I am sorry you are suffering, but know you are not alone . . .you have "us" and hopefully a higher power . . .you are never alone . . .can you do something nurturing for yourself? Have a nice dinner, watch a movie, take a bubble bath, read a magazine? You will survive this and be better for it . . .know you are loved . . .there is so much love in the universe and you are part of it . . .

Titanic

Hugggggssssss. Look at it another way. You finally got the strength and courage to do it! That is a hard thing to do. You are the loveable one! It's hard to be loveable to an A. And, you are here ... Not Alone. Welcome.

EnglishGarden

Your Higher Power has helped you to a safe place.

I agree with the above, soak your weary body in a hot tub, cry all the tears you have to cry into the water, wrap up with as many blankets as you can, and turn all your problems over to a power greater than yourself. Surrender. Ask angels to sit at the foot of your bed. Let go.

You have a destiny and it will unfold according to a divine plan, and all you need do is, as they say in the program, the next right thing. The right thing is actually usually easy to intuit. Do the next right thing and leave the outcome and the future to the wheel of Life and the God of your understanding. You are not alone at all. But you are in what is called a dark night of the soul, because you feel lost.

You will not remain lost. Let go, ask your friends to pray for you and sit with you. Your family, if friends are far away or you have lost them because of addiction in your relationship. And we care very much because we know the despair that comes of powerlessness.

God bless you. Get some rest. Life has much more waiting for you and it will be very good.

lillamy

You walked out because you needed to. See, you can trust yourself.
You are not alone. You are surrounded by people who have walked a similar path before you.
We know the fear. We know the loneliness. But we also know what English Garden says: All you have to do is be able to take the next step.

You don't have to solve all your problems tonight.
All you have to do right now is take care of yourself.

We're here. Big hugs.

cangel2

Good for you!! You are taking care of yourself.....order up some bubble bath, extra pillows and extra fluffy comforter and sink into the comfort and indulge yourself. This is the beginning of healing....love yourself!

sweetteewalls

Be proud of yourself and your strength. Some people never have the courage to leave. Don't beat yourself up. You are loveable, you are worthy! We are here for you.

marie1960

The primary foundation of a relationship is TWO people's needs are being satisfied. Over a period of time, the unacceptable actions of an alkie cracks the foundation, and it begins to crumble.

As sad and scary as it today, I believe your gut instinct is telling you something. Take this time and embrace YOU.

Acknowledging the fact that your needs are not being met is the first step in getting yourself to a better place.

We will be here as you sort out your life.

Be true to yourself, this is YOUR one precious life.

Hugs)))))

ShootingStar1

Kate5858, we are all here for you, and already, from your posts, we love you for your generous compassionate nature, for your ability to love and care deeply, and your capacity to commit yourself to someone's welfare.

I think that many of us on SoberRecovery would suggest that it is time for you to commit to putting your own welfare first now.

It is good that you left for the night. It is good that you are taking care of yourself. It may feel that you are running away, but the truth is you are starting to understand what you need for yourself, and to take care of yourself, and that can feel uncomfortable and unwarranted.

From my experience, having left my AH of almost 20 years on July 4th after his abuse and use of porn became intolerable, he has not changed, he does not want to change, and he will not change. Even if he loses me. Even if he loses himself. He will do what he wants to do.

Eventually, it has been sinking in that I cannot change him. I cannot will him to behave differently. I cannot wish him to treat me how I so desperately need to be treated, as a wife and a cherished partner, not as a whipping post to absorb his any and all grievances. This was an immensely hard pill for me to swallow. If I wanted it so hard, so fiercely, and I was so sure that I was RIGHT about what I wanted, then surely I could make it happen, I could make him be who I wanted him to be.

I can't. Alanon is right. I am powerless over alcohol. So when I think about the good times, when I think about what could still be, I cry until I feel that my heart is breaking. But I am still leaving.

You have courage, and you have the intuition of what is best for you to do for yourself. We are all here to stand by you and encourage you to take care of yourself, first.

BothSidesNow

Pebbles2012

Know that your strength and belief in yourself gave you the courage to leave even if its just temporarily. I just said a prayer for you. Today is a new day. Do whatever your heart needs to take care of you. You set one of the biggest boundaries by leaving,... and definitely one of the hardest. :-)