Originally Posted by Katchie

So, my new Q is, when one is married for 20 yrs with 4 children, one should never ask their spouse if they think they may have a problem? We should ignore it all never bringing up the subject? I'm really confused. There are no messes to clean up because of drunkenness, though around the house, as the housewife, I do 'clean up' the entire house. I've got a big family and we all pitch in the chores. I don't pay the bills, though not knowing about or paying attention to them may be a mistake for more reason that one. I haven't protected or lied for him because I've told all of our close friends we hang out with that alcohol is no longer allowed in my home, so don't bring it or we can't be friends. If he wants to tell his side of the family, that's his business, I'm not doing that for him. But as wife/mother of the home, I will say what Ill tolerate in my home and it's no longer alcohol.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't believe I'm doing those things.