Boundaries being respected
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Join Date: Jan 2012
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Boundaries being respected
AH and I are still going to marriage counseling once a week. Things have started to look up for us, and we are learning a lot about ourselves and each other.
He is aware of my boundaries, and has been respecting them without being resentful of them. He honestly seems to want us to all be together as a family, and is willing to do what it takes to make that happen. We are now laughing together again, spending time together on activities we both enjoy, and spending time with the kids as a family unit.
We have learned that we will not always have the same opinion on some matters, but it is okay as long as we can respect that. He is learning to understand that he can't micro-manage his days because "stuff" happens to throw off the schedule, and getting mad about it won't change it. I am learning that if he is stressed about something, it doesn't mean he's mad at me or that he expects me to fix whatever it is. I can let him vent about things that may have gone wrong at work without feeling like I have to move heaven and earth to make his frustration go away. We are both learning that "happiness breeds happiness, while anger breeds anger".
We also both know that we will each have a bad, frustrating, down day now and then, but we can be supportive without being controlling.
Life is not perfect, and I am okay with knowing that perfection is an unrealistic expectation. I do expect respect, courtesy, and love in this marriage. I am getting those.
Just thought I'd give an update, and let you all know how much I appreciate you.
He is aware of my boundaries, and has been respecting them without being resentful of them. He honestly seems to want us to all be together as a family, and is willing to do what it takes to make that happen. We are now laughing together again, spending time together on activities we both enjoy, and spending time with the kids as a family unit.
We have learned that we will not always have the same opinion on some matters, but it is okay as long as we can respect that. He is learning to understand that he can't micro-manage his days because "stuff" happens to throw off the schedule, and getting mad about it won't change it. I am learning that if he is stressed about something, it doesn't mean he's mad at me or that he expects me to fix whatever it is. I can let him vent about things that may have gone wrong at work without feeling like I have to move heaven and earth to make his frustration go away. We are both learning that "happiness breeds happiness, while anger breeds anger".
We also both know that we will each have a bad, frustrating, down day now and then, but we can be supportive without being controlling.
Life is not perfect, and I am okay with knowing that perfection is an unrealistic expectation. I do expect respect, courtesy, and love in this marriage. I am getting those.
Just thought I'd give an update, and let you all know how much I appreciate you.
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