rdlesstraveled

He is refusing to let me break up with him.

In the process of the break-up he told me all sorts of interesting things........ like he talked to his ex-girlfriend and she drove by one night and saw my Jeep......... like he was still dating this other girl when we reconnected.

So now his "distance" makes sense. He was obviously torn between 2 women...... nice soulmate, eh????

I am such a fool.

I screamed on the phone like I never screamed before. I am sick.

He is such a liar.

suki44883

If you want to break up with him, there is nothing he can do to stop it. DO you want to break up with him? If you do, then consider it done. Arrange to get your stuff, if there is any stuff, and then go completely no contact. No calls, no texts, no emails, no visits, no Facebook, no anything. Then, you will be broken up.

marie1960

I am confused, as Suki says if you are done be done. DONE = NO CONTACT.

If he continues to harrass/stalk, call the police, file a protective order, if needed.

You are a human being, you are not his property, he does not own you.

You are not a fool, you were just involved with someone who in unable to be in a relationship. Now you know. Knowledge is power. Go forward without regret, he has nothing to offer...

And yes they all seem to have the LIAR trait. Anything and everything to protect the addiction.

Take care.

rdlesstraveled

he has officially flipped out.

I ignored a call from him on my work number. I think that he just had a friend call my job pretending to be in investments.......

Then the text messages started. He was adament that I not come by tonight to get my stuff. When I pressed, he started cussing. He said that he would like my "****" in his truck and I could pick it up tomorrow morning.

Nice........

Katiekate

He is an alcoholic, you can expect more of the same.

Honey, this is typical behavior.

I wish I could take your pain away, you are dealing with someone who has taken off his human being costume, he has left the building, thrown himself under the bus.

We care about you , and your feelings. Please keep posting, get it all out.

Don't go over there by yourself to get your stuff. He has put himself in the gutter, his jig is up, last straw, he will be vigilent about making you feel like crap.

Try not to let him. Big Hug to you Katie

Learn2Live

Ignore the texts, calls, etc. Don't talk to him. Let things cool down. You can get your stuff later. Stop reacting to him. If you don't read his texts and don't talk to him, you can't react. They will say things purposely to HURT you to the core so that u go running back to them. Understand he is needy and sick. YOU take the high road. Don't take your anger out on the addict. Find healthy ways to take out your anger. Don't contribute to the sickness.

CodieBird

I'm with L2L. Let things cool off before you go to get your things, or better yet, send a friend to get them once things have cooled.

I predict you're not going to win any word engagements with him, whether voice, text or email. Also that he's not going to hear you or see your side ever. In my case, since he wants to believe that I did this to him or that it's all my fault, then whatever floats his boat. I know better, don't you too? Best of all, when I stopped engaging, I set myself free. That's all what matters.

Huggs to you, rlt. I will include you in my prayers tonight.

ZiggyB

I'm so sorry... yes if you say it is over there is nothing he can do about it. If he stalks you or continues to bother you, please get a restraining order.

Resist the urge to scream at him anymore, I know it is difficult. I was in your place not a month ago totally angry and just glad it's all over now.

Hypatia

"Stuff" can be replaced. You are irreplaceable. It might hurt to lose some stuff, but don't put yourself in a position where you might get hurt. Go no contact, and definitely don't go in person to try and collect anything.

Sending you strength and hugs.

Cyranoak

JustaBloke

I feel like a fool often for what I put up with, for what I let myself get into, and for how much of hole in my heart I let her create. But in the end we were just being kind. And that kind of foolishness is okay for me, as long as I recognize it and now become stronger and move on with my life.

We fought the good fight of reason, kindness and compassion against irrational, narcissistic anger....so much anger... But we will never get anywhere in this fight. Maybe some day long from now they will realize our compassion, i know im hopeful. But there is a good chance we will never get it. Nevertheless, let's continue to be kind and keep the foolishness for those close to enough to accept us, laugh with us and be foolish back.

Hang in there.

lillamy

Word.

Misguided

My last ex was like this. He managed to keep me hanging on for 8 months of dating. After I had it with the lies, cheating and late night calls/texts to girls showing on his phone bill, I kicked him to the curb...or so I thought.

Once I started seeing someone else, the ex passed in front of my house at 3am and decided to knock on my door. I did not open it and gave him 2 minutes to leave the property. He was arrested and his car was towed. Did I mention he was drunk and carrying hand guns in his car with felonies previously on his record? (I didn't know about the felonies until this happened). Then he had the audacity to have his mom call me to try to bail him out of jail. LOL!!!

So that should have ended it, right? No. It didn't. He continued to text me one day threating me, and my response was "Keep sending because I'm saving them all to get a restraining order and I will have you arrested again."

Luckily that is where it stopped. If I saw him out anywhere after that, he wouldn't even look at me.

I'm not saying you have to go to these extremes but if he's "not allowing" you to break up with him, sometimes you have to go to extremes to get it under control. People, especial when drinking, can become dangerous.

As far as getting your stuff...what kind of stuff? Is it really worth any kind of contact or can it just be stuff that can be tossed? If it's a few t-shirts and a toothbrush, I'd leave it be. If it's of value, have a friend pick it up as suggested or try to get a police officer to accompany you.