Daydream41

I had told my AH that if he drinks this weekend I have made arrangements to stay elsewhere with our daughter. Unfortunately the clear signs of drunkenness was not apparent until later in the evening and when I confronted him on it he pulled out all the guns about how I am a misruble bitch. How he was good all week. How I dont support him. And in the end I was beaten (not literally) down so far that I just shut down and went to bed.

He doesn't feel he needs help to stop. IF I would just do... Then he would not drink. So textbook. But I have been doing this for do long I just feel like I don't have the strength to jump off. The guilt I feel about what it will do to my 4 yr old who thinks Daddy is so fun and loud.

Do I take her away from her home and all her things because I dont see him leaving. I want this to stop so bad. I am so extremely unhappy and so angry all the time.

Tuffgirl

If you were a kid, which sounds better to you? A loud alcoholic Dad and a depressed, unhappy, angry Mom?

Or... a loud Alcoholic weekends only (maybe) Dad and a happy, centered, self confident Mom who took care of you, met your needs, and made life fun for you?

Sometimes we fear the very thing that is needed to make our situations better. Not that I advocate for divorce...I don't at all...unless the alternative is far more healthy than the current living arrangements. Alcoholics don't make good parents. Just ask the folks on the ACoA forum (two jumps down the home page from this forum).

Hollyanne

I agree with Tuffgirl.
I am sorry you are having a hard time.
Don't be hard on yourself.
The answers will come.
Read here and post. Lots of very wise and generous peeps here.