Unexpectedly Free
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 50
I read stbx' letter the next morning. In hindsight, I'm deeming that a poor choice. Spent the whole day composing a 2 page response. Was drained when done and only completed one chore on my massive Thursday 'before going away' list. I got up early Friday morning and in an hour had showered, packed a few things and was out the door for the bus to D.C.
The conference itself was awesome! I was not. By early evening of the first day, the right side of my jaw was throbbing. Large doses of ibuprofen were not helping. I was very thankful that conference attendees were provided a "free drink" voucher. I identified the most sympathetic looking bartender and told him - "I have a terrible toothache and am not a drinker. Would you please fix me something strong?" He poured me a Long Island Iced Tea. It worked well enough to get me through the 2 hour dinner presentation.
I retired to my hotel room immediately after dinner and went to sleep quickly. At ~2am, I woke up in tremendous pain again. My face and jaw were swelling quickly. Another large dose of ibuprofen let me go back to sleep for a few more hours, but I was up again by 6am. More ibuprofen and a quick shower, out of my non-smoking room to smoke and wander aimlessly in pain. I wondered if anyone but me noticed that it looked like I had a golf ball stuffed into the right side of my jaw. The pain was excruciating and unending. It took 3 more 'iced teas' starting at noon Saturday to get me through the rest of the presentations and back on the bus for home.
Slept pretty soundly on the bus home and by 7 hours later when we reached my stop, the pain had backed down significantly. My face is still swollen today, but I'm no longer having trouble opening my mouth or in pain when eating. Also, a months' long painful kink in my right shoulder/neck has gone away and a stiff, sore 'trigger thumb' problem that I'd developed in both hands a few weeks ago has been reduced to just a slightly stiff right thumb.
I'm not a doctor and don't even play one on TV, but won't let that stop me from taking liberty to chalk all of these physical foibles up to one cause: TOXIC STRESS!!!
That two page response for stbx has now been reduced to two lines:
Dear Xxxxx,
As many wonderful adventures as we've shared together, it's time for me to part ways with you. There has been far too much toxic water passed under our relationship bridge.
I wish you and (your son) the best in moving forward from here.
(CodieBird)
The conference itself was awesome! I was not. By early evening of the first day, the right side of my jaw was throbbing. Large doses of ibuprofen were not helping. I was very thankful that conference attendees were provided a "free drink" voucher. I identified the most sympathetic looking bartender and told him - "I have a terrible toothache and am not a drinker. Would you please fix me something strong?" He poured me a Long Island Iced Tea. It worked well enough to get me through the 2 hour dinner presentation.
I retired to my hotel room immediately after dinner and went to sleep quickly. At ~2am, I woke up in tremendous pain again. My face and jaw were swelling quickly. Another large dose of ibuprofen let me go back to sleep for a few more hours, but I was up again by 6am. More ibuprofen and a quick shower, out of my non-smoking room to smoke and wander aimlessly in pain. I wondered if anyone but me noticed that it looked like I had a golf ball stuffed into the right side of my jaw. The pain was excruciating and unending. It took 3 more 'iced teas' starting at noon Saturday to get me through the rest of the presentations and back on the bus for home.
Slept pretty soundly on the bus home and by 7 hours later when we reached my stop, the pain had backed down significantly. My face is still swollen today, but I'm no longer having trouble opening my mouth or in pain when eating. Also, a months' long painful kink in my right shoulder/neck has gone away and a stiff, sore 'trigger thumb' problem that I'd developed in both hands a few weeks ago has been reduced to just a slightly stiff right thumb.
I'm not a doctor and don't even play one on TV, but won't let that stop me from taking liberty to chalk all of these physical foibles up to one cause: TOXIC STRESS!!!
That two page response for stbx has now been reduced to two lines:
Dear Xxxxx,
As many wonderful adventures as we've shared together, it's time for me to part ways with you. There has been far too much toxic water passed under our relationship bridge.
I wish you and (your son) the best in moving forward from here.
(CodieBird)
To thine own self be true.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
Jeez CodieBird, are you going to call the dentist? I hope so.
I understand the reaction of the 2-hr response. AXBF sent me an email yesterday that sent me into a tailspin. Then sent text messages, which I had already asked him not to do, to only send emails (so that I don't have to see or hear them during the course of my day), and my brain just jumped to the past and all of this thinking and figuring out and pain has erupted. Still recovering from that.
Hope you're doing well now.
I understand the reaction of the 2-hr response. AXBF sent me an email yesterday that sent me into a tailspin. Then sent text messages, which I had already asked him not to do, to only send emails (so that I don't have to see or hear them during the course of my day), and my brain just jumped to the past and all of this thinking and figuring out and pain has erupted. Still recovering from that.
Hope you're doing well now.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 50
I've been saving for the dental overhaul my mouth will require, but am not quite there yet. However, I had enough amoxicillin for a full course here at home and started my dose yesterday morning. Initially, it didn't seem to be working, but woke up this morning with significantly less swelling and no need for a breakfast of ibuprofen. Yay!
It occurred to me this morning that framing is everything. He didn't make me physically ill, rather, I allow him to have a profoundly unhealthy affect upon me. In that light, there is no need to review the relationship or question myself, much less make him understand anything. My #1 priority should be, and is, to protect MY health and well being.
It occurred to me this morning that framing is everything. He didn't make me physically ill, rather, I allow him to have a profoundly unhealthy affect upon me. In that light, there is no need to review the relationship or question myself, much less make him understand anything. My #1 priority should be, and is, to protect MY health and well being.
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