New here, addicted SIL
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Peoria, Illinois
Posts: 1
New here, addicted SIL
This is my first post. My SIL (husband's sister) has an alcohol addiction but is in denial. She is 30 and recently separated from her husband (mostly due to the alcohol issue).
For about the past 10 years, she has been a drinker, but it has escalated over the past few years. She works second shift, drinks by herself from midnight to 8 or so in the morning, passes out, then wakes up just in time to get to work again at 3 pm.
When we are in social situations, she gets drunk then makes a scene - usually about how awful their mother is (She's not - she's awesome, supportive, and she's tried every way to get through to my SIL but she moved to Singapore a year ago). My SIL also cries and yells about a variety of topics in public and has even been know to throw food while out at restaurants.
About seven weeks ago, we decided we'd had enough. My MIL and FIL wrote her an email about how she needs to get help, how they will stop enabling her, etc., and we got on board. They told her they are happy to communicate with her when she's sober, but she hasn't talked to any of us since.
We have a weeklong family vacation at the end of July that has been planned for months, and she has recently insinuated on her Facebook status that she intends on still going. How do we handle this when no one has talked to her in seven weeks and her habits haven't changed?
For about the past 10 years, she has been a drinker, but it has escalated over the past few years. She works second shift, drinks by herself from midnight to 8 or so in the morning, passes out, then wakes up just in time to get to work again at 3 pm.
When we are in social situations, she gets drunk then makes a scene - usually about how awful their mother is (She's not - she's awesome, supportive, and she's tried every way to get through to my SIL but she moved to Singapore a year ago). My SIL also cries and yells about a variety of topics in public and has even been know to throw food while out at restaurants.
About seven weeks ago, we decided we'd had enough. My MIL and FIL wrote her an email about how she needs to get help, how they will stop enabling her, etc., and we got on board. They told her they are happy to communicate with her when she's sober, but she hasn't talked to any of us since.
We have a weeklong family vacation at the end of July that has been planned for months, and she has recently insinuated on her Facebook status that she intends on still going. How do we handle this when no one has talked to her in seven weeks and her habits haven't changed?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 145
If you don't want to be around her, then stay home. Who made the travel arrangements? Your husband's parents? It's up to them to ask her to stay home. If they don't, and she doesn't, then I would stay home myself. Setting boundaries is defining what you will accept, not an attempt to control the behavior of another.
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