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Talking to the A about trust

Old 04-30-2012, 11:18 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Lizatola, I totally hear you about having your "love tank" run dry. I felt that last year when I separated from my AH. I was sooo dry, it was like I could not even feel joy anymore, or if I did, it was fleeting and the feelings of anxiety, worry, anger, betrayal and rage quickly blocked it out. Over time, and in a more sane environment (without him around daily), I felt the love trickling back into my heart. Then I'd have moments of pure joy, and over time they have happened more and more. I still have many dark days/moments, but it's getting better. It will happen for you, too, if you focus on YOU. You can't fix him. You can only fix yourself. Hang in there, we are here for you.
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:24 AM
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It doesn't sound as though he is taking responsibility where this DUI is concerned Liz...He is planning to rent a car in Calif. Of course the rental company will run his licence. Let him find that out himself. That he's thinking about buying a beater and putting the interlock on that? Hmm, might look suspicious that the licence of his regular car and the one that is on file with the police, won't be the car he drives anymore, but a jalopy. Hmm... Let him find that out himself. Boy, he just thinks he's a genius....
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:31 AM
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Originally Posted by choublak View Post
Um what's a "super extreme DUI"? I always thought a DUI was a DUI..."y punto".
I wondered the same. I mean drunk is drunk.
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:34 AM
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Originally Posted by gerryP View Post
It doesn't sound as though he is taking responsibility where this DUI is concerned Liz...He is planning to rent a car in Calif. Of course the rental company will run his licence. Let him find that out himself. That he's thinking about buying a beater and putting the interlock on that? Hmm, might look suspicious that the licence of his regular car and the one that is on file with the police, won't be the car he drives anymore, but a jalopy. Hmm... Let him find that out himself. Boy, he just thinks he's a genius....
Yes, a sad pathetic genius. Here's some of his words from his emails:
He thinks I'm planning on leaving him or finding a boyfriend. He thinks I'm prepping our son for leaving him(which I'm not). He sees no way he can be a part of our lives anymore because it's obvious he's not welcome here. He said he doesn't want to fight with me so he's not engaging me anymore. He says he wants me to be happy but knows that he can't really make that happen. He is giving it all to God and asking for His guidance.

Well, for someone who wants me to be happy he sure has a great way of expressing it. I guess I have to suck it up and talk to him. UGH!
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Old 04-30-2012, 12:53 PM
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I know none of this can be easy for you Lizatola....
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Old 04-30-2012, 02:15 PM
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It seems that you are more afraid of his DUI consequences than he is. What will you do if he does continue to drive without a license? Alcoholics have very cloudy thinking & not even Sheriff Joe's tough jail can scare a true alcoholic into sobriety. There is no logic in Alcoholism.
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Old 04-30-2012, 02:16 PM
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Originally Posted by gerryP View Post
I know none of this can be easy for you Lizatola....
I agree.

You are doing great.

One day at a time, right?!
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Old 04-30-2012, 03:33 PM
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Originally Posted by Pelican View Post
I agree.

You are doing great.

One day at a time, right?!
Thank you!
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