Talking to the A about trust
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: California
Posts: 693
Lizatola, I totally hear you about having your "love tank" run dry. I felt that last year when I separated from my AH. I was sooo dry, it was like I could not even feel joy anymore, or if I did, it was fleeting and the feelings of anxiety, worry, anger, betrayal and rage quickly blocked it out. Over time, and in a more sane environment (without him around daily), I felt the love trickling back into my heart. Then I'd have moments of pure joy, and over time they have happened more and more. I still have many dark days/moments, but it's getting better. It will happen for you, too, if you focus on YOU. You can't fix him. You can only fix yourself. Hang in there, we are here for you.
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Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,049
It doesn't sound as though he is taking responsibility where this DUI is concerned Liz...He is planning to rent a car in Calif. Of course the rental company will run his licence. Let him find that out himself. That he's thinking about buying a beater and putting the interlock on that? Hmm, might look suspicious that the licence of his regular car and the one that is on file with the police, won't be the car he drives anymore, but a jalopy. Hmm... Let him find that out himself. Boy, he just thinks he's a genius....
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 2,349
Originally Posted by gerryP 
It doesn't sound as though he is taking responsibility where this DUI is concerned Liz...He is planning to rent a car in Calif. Of course the rental company will run his licence. Let him find that out himself. That he's thinking about buying a beater and putting the interlock on that? Hmm, might look suspicious that the licence of his regular car and the one that is on file with the police, won't be the car he drives anymore, but a jalopy. Hmm... Let him find that out himself. Boy, he just thinks he's a genius....
He thinks I'm planning on leaving him or finding a boyfriend. He thinks I'm prepping our son for leaving him(which I'm not). He sees no way he can be a part of our lives anymore because it's obvious he's not welcome here. He said he doesn't want to fight with me so he's not engaging me anymore. He says he wants me to be happy but knows that he can't really make that happen. He is giving it all to God and asking for His guidance.
Well, for someone who wants me to be happy he sure has a great way of expressing it. I guess I have to suck it up and talk to him. UGH!
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 2,284
It seems that you are more afraid of his DUI consequences than he is. What will you do if he does continue to drive without a license? Alcoholics have very cloudy thinking & not even Sheriff Joe's tough jail can scare a true alcoholic into sobriety. There is no logic in Alcoholism.
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