It's been a bumpy ride...UPDATE
 

I haven't been on here for a while. I suppose because the direct affects of alcoholism and its insanity don't really interfere w/ my life on a day to day basis anymore. Life, in general, is good. I was forced to get a protective order in January, due to STBXAH threatening my life. THis proved to be a very powerful more for me emotionally and truly let me break free. Following this I filed for divorce. STBXAH has 3 criminal charges for break the protective order. This is a very intersting situation, however, because while I feel I did what I had to, he may end up losing both jobs...which means me losing support....which IS a big deal, since I have lots of mouths to feed. SOmehow it seems like when it comes to him there is never any winning - I also am on the losing side. All that aside, I am finally feeling more like the ME that I know, and I like that. I am also aware however that I will carry many issues from my time married to him and in a relationship with him, for some time. Sometimes, these issues hit me out of nowhere, and sometimes, they slowly build up in me. I am working SO hard at trying to live my life...and wow do I have to battle codependancy every step of the way. Again...all this said, thinking back to where I have been, and what was happened, and the pain and sorrow I felt then, I am SO very thankful for SR and the people here who helped me to break free and do what was necessary! I know I still have a LONG LONG road, but everyday I feel SO much better...life is good.

Thanks for the update! I've thought about you and wondered how things were going. Hang in there! You are past the most difficult part, which is getting up the courage to make the break. Things will get better for you and your children. :grouphug:

Hey Freeing!

Good to read your update. Congratulations on all your positive actions. It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of growth. Good for you! Things will definitely be different for awhile Freeing, but you are carving out a new life for yourself and kids.

keep posting!

I'm so glad you posted this because it helps all of us see that the hard work really pays off. These actions do a great deal to boost our self-esteem. Thanks for showing us there is a light at the end of the tunnel.