inpieces314

I worked 6-2 saturday, the EX (he is now, he wasn't then) was supposed to be watching my kids. Sorry, OUR kids. I got home at 2:20, and my door was open, I had to run around and chase my cats into the house, and no ex, no kids, nothing. No note, no food missing, no dishes in the sink, nothing. So I was like, ok, maybe they took a walk, but I doubt it. So I knocked on the neighbor's door, and he didn't know anything. So I am about to call 911 and report my kids missing, when he shows up with them.

He said they went to the park. I asked the 5 year old if they went to the ex's sister's house, and he said yes. THEN he starts screaming in my face that he is just as much a parent as I am and he can take them wherever he wants and he doesn't need my permission. Ok, he IS NOT the 5 year old's father, at all. He IS NOT on the 5 month old's birth certificate. So it is only his word to the cops that he is his father. And regardless, it is still kidnapping. What the hell was I supposed to think when I came home and everything was missing and my door was open?! Parents get arrested for kidnapping all the time.

And he went to his SISTER'S house. I HATE her. She is calling me at work, I blocked her number on my phone but that doesn't stop her from using random numbers to threaten me, she attacks me on facebook, she told me if I went to her house she would beat my ass. So why in the hell would I let my kids go somewhere like that?! Oh, and the EX knows all of this, but it is all MY fault, I am PARANOID and PSYCHOTIC and everything else because she really has no problem with me at all, I am making the whole thing up. Whatever dude. She stole his credit card and ran it up so now he has to pay all these fines and stuff, she is using him for his money, she does all this stuff to him. And the worst thing is, he admits it. But he doesn't understand why that means she can't see the kids. Um, because she is threatening me, so who's to say what is going on with MY kids in HER house when I am not allowed over there?! HELL NO!

I screamed at him for an hour straight, I didn't stop. He told me to call my parents and see what they think (idiot) so my dad wouldn't get off the phone until he left. And I haven't seen him since. And I am happy about it.

Might I mention, he has no phone, and he WALKED across a HIGHWAY to get to his sister's house. DRUNK! WITH MY KIDS!

I am starting to think, alcohol isn't his biggest problem. It's HER. He has been an alcoholic for as long as I have known him, and until she came into the picture, he paid his bills, he was responsible, he did whatever he was supposed to do. Now he magically has no money, ever. He got paid today, and he owes me a lot of money. Either he will give it to me to see if I will forgive him, or he will avoid me so he doesn't have to give it to me.

He knows he is wrong. I want nothing to do with him and I told him that. I have nothing but hate for him. I always knew he would pick his sister over me, and it pisses me off. But it is another thing altogether to pick your sister over your own kids. He can go live with her as far as I am concerned.

Thumper

Venting is good. SR is a good place to do it. I'd be irate too.

Babysitters are also good. Well worth the money to leave your kids with a sober someone that you can trust.

inpieces314

Yeah, I told him I would have called out had I known what he was going to do. It wasn't worth the money I made that day to be that stressed out about it.

Thumper

Never trust him again. Do not count on him to ever watch the kids. Stay out of his relationship with the kids. Do not ask him to watch them or arrange visitation. He'll make the effort to arrange it if he wants it and you can handle those occasions appropriatly as they arise.

It took several extremely crazy making weeks for me to finally learn that lesson. Once learned - my life was immeasurably more peaceful and calm. There was also some dangerous situations as a result of me leaving them with him and that still weighs heavy on my soul. I wasn't always making very good decisions but I learned and I am forever thankful that no one was ever hurt. Sadly, they were pretty crazy for my kids too and those memories/feelings/confusion will be with them forever.

SoaringSpirits

Well, now you know that you can NEVER leave him alone with your children again.

wanttobehealthy

sounds like his sister is stalking/harassing you. file for a ro against her and that way you get to have the law keep her from contacting you or the kids and the kids won't be over there anytime in the near future.

i'm so sorry for your weekend. i'd be raving mad too.

inpieces314

Yeah, it just sucks that he has to do it this way. He did come with money and said that he's going to screw me with visitation. Yeah, right, only if you want to pay child support. And the 5 year old isn't his, so he has no right to see him, ever. And trust me, I will go that route.

And he said he rented a house today in the horrible section of town, coincidentally down the road from his sister. Which I doubt, he definitely doesn't have the money to get all that. But I am pissed anyway because how can he not have any money to help ME with MY bills but go get his OWN place?!

I talked to his friend, who knew nothing about it, and he said don't worry about it, he was probably drunk anyway, and lying out his ass like he always does when he gets drunk. We all know he will be begging to take him back in a week, but I don't care. He crossed the line. It just sucks that HE messed up yet MY KIDS AND I are paying the price.