What addicts do...

Old 06-14-2004, 06:19 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Good bump JT.
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Old 06-14-2004, 08:12 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
No More Mrs. Nice Guy
osier59's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Iowa
Posts: 724
This is something I need to hear and read over and over and OVER again. Even though I am getting better and have yrs of recovery under MY belt, that doesnt mean the A's around me are working their steps and are seeking recovery.

I need to remember that they aren't doing it TO me, they are just doing it. And the reason is that they are addicts, doing what addicts do.

Thanks Jon,and thanks JT.

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Old 06-15-2004, 07:13 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
Learning to love life...
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Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 529
Thanks for bumping this back up... I haven't been here in months and it was nice to come back with this thread.

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Old 06-15-2004, 07:20 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Hey there Meg, you have been missed.
Glad you're back.
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Old 03-02-2008, 08:22 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: NH
Posts: 2
Can relate

Man, I needed to read Jon's words tonight. I just broke up with my second addict bf this week. I have been working the Alanon program and I think I am finally starting to get the 3 A's down.
2.Accept it

I was seeing a guy that has 10 month clean. He was so attentive and loving to me. The only problem was he was a bum really. He was couch surfing, no job, no money, no licence. I bought him cigs and he started to expect me to. I fed him and did his laundry. When I finally told him I couldn't afford his cigs he went to work for day labor. He got canned half way through the day for not working. The minute he got his 30 dollars he was outa here and havent seen him since. I called and told him I wasn't ready for a relationship. I feel like a fool but after reading what Jon wrote it is par for the course.

I dated one other addict and he was also very loving followed by being very distant. He had two sides and one was nice and one was mean. He spent very little time with me and went through money like water. I caught him using and broke it off. He denied being high but he was nodding off so bad his teeth fell on the floor.

I think I am going to stay away from dating any more addicts unless they are working a program and have some clean time. They are just so heartbreaking and needy.

Thanks for the post, Kammie
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Old 03-02-2008, 08:25 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,290
Originally Posted by Kam123 View Post
I think I am going to stay away from dating any more addicts unless they are working a program and have some clean time.

Why not just stay away from addicts. Period.
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Old 03-03-2008, 12:19 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: A great big world, with lots of places to run to
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Wow. Just ... wow. Thank you, Jon, for writing that.
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