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xAH arrested

Old 02-13-2012, 07:45 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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WTBH...Sending you GIGANTIC HUGS of love and support. You're doing the right thing mama and following the path HP has laid out for you. I'm so sorry you had to go through that, but I am grateful that you're taking steps to protect yourself and your DDs.

And screw the credit rating. Right now, safety first.

****HHUUUUUUGGGGSSS*****
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Old 02-13-2012, 08:11 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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i think you are making a smart move too. I hope that his visitation is curtailed (at least for now). He and mama are too manipulative.
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Old 02-13-2012, 08:38 AM
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There are laws on the books to protect victims of domestic violence, some of which revolve around 'bending the rules' for apartment applications, divulging private information, utility connections, etc. Aside from consulting your attorney, you can get a lot of useful info from your local DV counseling center. They are there to help you thru situations just like this.

This is also an excellent resource for online information: WomensLaw.org | Home

(((Hugs)))
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Old 02-13-2012, 10:45 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wanttobehealthy View Post
Going to visit local apt complex that has a few rentals at this time... it's in the same district I live in so D6 won't have to switch schools. I may regret screwing my credit up later but right now my safety, security and sanity is well worth it.

I am seriously considering signing a lease if it looks decent.

This weekend scared me and I do not wish to become a statistic the next time xAH goes crazy...
I screwed up my credit getting out. Wouldn't change it for the world. Your safety and that of your kids is much more important than the credit score. My new landlords knew the situation, I was completely open and honest about it. They don't care about my credit.

Good job!
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Old 02-13-2012, 10:55 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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WTBH -You ROCK! I am so proud of your attitude right now...very proactive and assertive. Calm and rational. Your recovery is SHINING!



P.S. I know this sucks, and I am especially sorry for the traumatic experience in front of your daughters. But they are watching you. They are seeing this and it is registering, so go do the right thing for them. This is not a healthy relationship model. But you can be! And one day - they will come back and respect the heck out of you for showing them how to stand up for themselves. I say this from my own experience...my Mom doesn't take any B.S. and neither do I, and I now have two teenager girls who are doing the same. No one else is going to protect us but us.
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Old 02-13-2012, 11:23 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by MyBetterWorld View Post
I screwed up my credit getting out. Wouldn't change it for the world. Your safety and that of your kids is much more important than the credit score. My new landlords knew the situation, I was completely open and honest about it. They don't care about my credit.

Good job!
Ditto. When I left XAH, we'd filed bankruptcy a couple years before, all the credit was in my name so his wouldn't get marred... I'm pretty sure the apt manager knew what was up, probably because I told him I'd take whatever came open first - anything - and stressed that it would be JUST DS and I.

WTBH, big bear hugs for you and your kiddos.
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Old 02-13-2012, 02:02 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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((WTBH))

Just wanted to share how glad I am for you to take such great care and show such wonderful respect for YOU and YOUR daughters!

You are a very brave woman and a wonderful example of recovery!

Keep doing the Next Right Thing for you and your children - y'all deserve it!

PINK HUGS,
Rita
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Old 02-13-2012, 03:29 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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I would definitely look into your local laws with domestic violence. Just because the house is in both of your names, that means absolutely nothing if he is hurting you. At the very very least, you can make sure he is not at the house when you or the kids are there because you are feeling threatened. And it really doesn't matter if he ends up in jail for domestic abuse anyway, because he obviously won't be able to get into the house. Do not let him put that on you. HE is the one breaking the law. HE is the one who is going to pay for it.
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Old 02-13-2012, 03:55 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by lillamy View Post
I am so stinkin' proud of you
I just had to highten the words....and i am among others...!! you got your back bone!!
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Old 02-13-2012, 05:34 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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F the credit score. You save it when you can, but when you can't you can't. I too forfeit mine to a divorce and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Cyranoak
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Old 02-13-2012, 05:45 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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I went to the library and educated myself on divorce law for my state.
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Old 02-14-2012, 05:41 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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You just went from being a victim to being a survivor. You no longer live in the problem, you live in the solution. I too am so very proud of you for doing the right thing, no matter how hard it was to do.

Hugs
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Old 02-14-2012, 06:31 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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So sorry you had to go thru this and that your kids were upset.
You handled a very difficult situation very well - Good for you. You are so strong.
I hope you are ok now and not badly hurt.
M.
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Old 02-14-2012, 02:13 PM
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Hey, WTBH..... how ya feelin' today?

What do you hear from the other camp? Anything?
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Old 02-14-2012, 03:38 PM
  # 35 (permalink)  
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Are the kids better? I hope you didn't get the flu...
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Old 02-15-2012, 07:04 AM
  # 36 (permalink)  
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Hi,
I posted last night saying we all were home sick yesterday (and D6 was sent home sick on Mon). Both girls have strep and some unrelated stomach bug and I'm under the weather too but Mom's don't get to be sick when kids are sick so I'm dealing... I am back at work today but feeling like death warmed over so I may leave early.

No word from xAH bc the R.O. is in place and I've told my lawyer I want the R.O. extended once the 10 day mandatory one is up and I intend to fight to be sure that happens.
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Old 02-15-2012, 08:09 AM
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WTBH, (((((HUGS))))

Just a little something to keep you going. We are all behind you.

Your friend,
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Old 02-15-2012, 08:12 AM
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WTBH,

The stuff going around is nasty and hangs on, if you can stay home and rest please do so, feel so bad for all of you, wish I could send some homemade soup.

Hang in there, big hugs.

Bill
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Old 02-15-2012, 08:28 AM
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Hi,
I posted last night saying we all were home sick yesterday (and D6 was sent home sick on Mon). Both girls have strep and some unrelated stomach bug and I'm under the weather too but Mom's don't get to be sick when kids are sick so I'm dealing... I am back at work today but feeling like death warmed over so I may leave early.

No word from xAH bc the R.O. is in place and I've told my lawyer I want the R.O. extended once the 10 day mandatory one is up and I intend to fight to be sure that happens.
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Old 02-15-2012, 08:54 AM
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WTBH, I hope you and your girls feel better soon. I have been following your story and am happy that you are staying strong despite the difficult circumstances. Sending more strength to you!
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