Things are different now..>2nd Time in Rehab
 

Last year, when I was married and he went into
rehab, I thought he was going to be cured.

I thought he would come out of there and life would be normal

I thought it was the "magic cure", you spend $10,000
and it will fix you right!?!??!!?

A year later...He is now checked into a 90 day rehab

We are now divorced

He doesnt have access to one of those crazy things they call
a "PHONE", but in his first 8 days, he has figured out how to mail
letters.

This year, I dont believe in a "magic cure"
and the letters are the next best thing to a roll of charmin...

I do hope that he gets sober, but it sure is easier this time
around when Im not the one trying to fix him!!

Good for you!

That's it...let him go.

I went into rehab in Sept. My family forced me. They thought it would be a magic cure. I came out and drank 6 days later much to everyone's dismay.

Jan 2, "I" called treatment and begged them to take me back. They got me in the next day there is usually a 2 month wait.

I made the choice. I was different: I am different. My husband took me back. He never gave up. The children are a bit harder but I am working on it. Sometimes it just takes what it takes and is what it is.

I am not saying take him back only you know that answer. But you could be supportive. There must be something good in him for God is giving him another chance.

I have a now list. Later list and Never list.

As I clean out my now list...
The best support that I can give him now, is to set him free...

For how long...
 

How long are we supposed to be supportive exactly? How much of my life was I supposed to forfeit to support her in her drunkenness. Lost the house? Check. Lose two cars? Check. Lose my life savings. Check. Lose my 30s and 40s and forfeit my daughter's childhood. Check.

You have no idea how much support is given before we finally give up. No idea. None. There's another board for you on Sober Recovery. This is the board for friends and family of alcoholics.

We here have learned that the words, "I am different" don't mean anything. Actions, over a very long period of time, show when you are different. That's it. Nothing else. Even then it takes a long, long, long, long time for us to stop waiting for the next alcoholic event, if ever.

It is impossible to explain to people who have not experienced it themselves, on this side of the street, the special kind of hell we live in even after the alcoholic stops drinking. And it is worse for my daughter.

I wish you, your husband, and especially your children peace and serenity.

Cyranoak

Thank you, C.

And Bobby? See how far you have come? You have not "given up on him" -- you have taken care of yourself. And that is all that you are responsible for. :)

There is no magic cure for addiction. It can however be arrested at some point and recovery is then possible. Staying clean is a inside job. I have to do the deal on a daily basis to stay clean. I hope he will stay sober and do the deal this time. Time will tell. Just take care of yourself an things will work out for you. Hope this helps. Logo