You can leave, you may have to do it afraid!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: too close to the fire
Posts: 173
You can leave, you may have to do it afraid!
Hi everyone,
I left him sometime in April.........
I was failing to thrive. My children and I were begininng to tread water. I realized when we spent all of our time in isolation when he was home that it was time. I finally planned my escape. I put my things in a garbage bag and brought them out to the trash like usual only to take them with me later. The mind does desperate things when it needs too. I left the following days on a motorcycle, NEVER to return and that was when I realized, I could do it!
All of my FEARS had been LAID to REST.
I have been gone since, and believe me, it has not been easy! I have been hungry, cold uncomfortable, lonely, pissed, you name it but nothing has come close to the feelings I used to feel with the AHB in my life.
iloveme now truly! God Bless you!
I left him sometime in April.........
I was failing to thrive. My children and I were begininng to tread water. I realized when we spent all of our time in isolation when he was home that it was time. I finally planned my escape. I put my things in a garbage bag and brought them out to the trash like usual only to take them with me later. The mind does desperate things when it needs too. I left the following days on a motorcycle, NEVER to return and that was when I realized, I could do it!
All of my FEARS had been LAID to REST.
I have been gone since, and believe me, it has not been easy! I have been hungry, cold uncomfortable, lonely, pissed, you name it but nothing has come close to the feelings I used to feel with the AHB in my life.
iloveme now truly! God Bless you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: too close to the fire
Posts: 173
Recently, I changed my phone number. I had to for my own sanity. Every morning I would wake up to atleast five messages waiting in my inbox. I would begin my day just as I did when I lived there. Today I experience true freedom, the freedom to make choices simple choices.
I do not miss it.
I do know however that, my daughters watched every moment of this, the staying the bargaining, the reasoning, the fear, the planning, the leaving, and the struggle. My only hope is that through it all they will not do as I say, but as I do and realize they do not deserve to be abused by this type of man.
I do not miss it.
I do know however that, my daughters watched every moment of this, the staying the bargaining, the reasoning, the fear, the planning, the leaving, and the struggle. My only hope is that through it all they will not do as I say, but as I do and realize they do not deserve to be abused by this type of man.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 204
I know what you mean about changing the phone number. Even when you leave, if they still have access to email and phone it's like they still have a lot of power over you. After I left my ex-AH in April, I still found myself obsessively checking for email and phone messages. It was pretty crazy. I blocked the email a few months later and lost the cell phone a few months ago and it helped my recovery a lot. We only talk via his parents regarding the kids. I am very happy to hear about another person who successfully left a bad situation and is doing well. Good for you!
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