LostinLV777

Well, after a long hellish 6months of rehab, and detox, my AH is off to sober living for a month. i have the divorce papers in hand ready to go at any time, but im just waiting now.

will a month of sobriety change the way i feel? probably not. would six months of sobriety change my thoughts, possibly. but really thinking about it, if he was sober 3 yrs, and then relapsed and caused myself or our kids harm, financial trouble, emotional distress, etc....
who would i blame for the damage?

I would blame myself for sticking around when i already know that hes an A.

so what is that telling me? perhaps that ive hit my rockbottom.that ive just become so fed up w/ the drama that i can never truly trust that hell be good husband or father material permanently.

if i married a normie, would this even be a thought in my mind? God NO! noones perfect, but i imagine we'd be working on actual marriage and family concepts, like, planning for our retirement, saving for college funds, talking about traveling, and negotiating our parenting skills.

Instead i sit here and question if this man can ever be the man i need in my life. something tells me that that pondering that question alone is the answer im looking for.

Taking5

I don't understand. If he has been in detox and rehab for 6 months is he not already 6 months sober?

suki44883

Yeah, sometimes, recovery just comes too late. Relapse is always a possibility, so unless you're prepared to go through all this again, you may have actually answered your own question.

choublak

Me neither.

LostinLV777

no hes not been sober. he had 90 days sober (with inpatient and outpatient program). day 90 he relapsed and hasnt been sober for more than 20 days since. each re-occurence has been progressively worse and ive had to take him to detox twice to start over, only to drink again after a week or so...