Declaration of Alcohol Independence
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Earth... mostly
Posts: 43
Declaration of Alcohol Independence
I wrote this a while back after my spouse got toasted and passed out (again) in front of our friends... who also were passing out from their all day drinking.
Declaration of Alcohol Independence
6 July 2009
I am writing this Declaration of Alcohol Independence to make a public announcement to all family and friends that from this day forward I will not allow myself to be the victim of people who choose to drink themselves into states of alcoholic stupor and who become oppressive and abusive while drunk, who are oppressive and abusive when they are recovering from being drunk and who can only associate friendship with alcohol.
I have seen loved ones:
sick and vomiting;
blacked out on floors and on furniture;
laughed at by their friends
have no recall of their actions;
hung over for days;
start fights with family and with me;
drive while drunk;
endanger others lives;
be emotionally wrecked;
miss work while hung over;
be constantly exhausted and angry;
in total denial of their alcohol problem
I have been repeatedly shown and told that drinking is more important than my marriage.
I have been degraded, humiliated, insulted and mocked by alcoholics.
I have been instructed to not broach the subject of alcoholism in our family.
I have been repeatedly shown that drinking and suffering blackouts and hangovers is more important than even going to church on Sundays.
I have been repeatedly shown that more time is dedicated to and unquestionably reserved for drinking each week than is reserved for family and church and God.
On the 4th of July, 2009 the final incentive was given to me by being surrounded by people who have a greater love of drinking than they have for their own health and well being. I saw friends and family drink until they blacked out but not before they made fools of themselves and had their inebriated friends laugh at their condition. Then they all drove home.
This was not the first occurrence of this but it will be my last attendance of this. Life is too short to waste time on drunks and hangovers and the abuse and self destruction that flows from them.
As of today:
I will not enable the alcoholic life choice for anyone and I will not participate in it.
I will not pay for the purchase beer, wine, whiskey or any other drinking alcohol for consumption by anyone.
I will not pay for any alcohol consumed during dinners out, for and gift alcohol and for any alcohol brought into the house for parties, dinners and other occasions. This includes alcohol purchased for consumption by “responsible,
casual drinkers” and family members.
I will not pay for alcohol purchased along with groceries in supermarkets that sell alcohol.
I will not support or welcome alcohol being brought into our house.
I will not attend personal or social events where, historically, family and friends get drunk.
I will ensure that any alcohol that is brought into my home is removed by the owner when he/she leaves or I will
dispose of it.
I will consider gifts of alcohol to be what they are. They are poison for my wife and they are future pain,
misery and destruction for her and for our marriage.
I will always consider how to avoid drunks and how to ensure that I can escape from situations where
family and friends are getting drunk.
I will do what I can to help those in need but I realize that some people do not want help, that they will
resent help and that they will resent me for not participating in or enabling their alcoholism.
****
Sadly, I have not held to the letter of this declaration and many arguments have arisen as the result of my stand, but it has given me some sense of control over myself and my actions. I'm still working on it all.
Declaration of Alcohol Independence
6 July 2009
I am writing this Declaration of Alcohol Independence to make a public announcement to all family and friends that from this day forward I will not allow myself to be the victim of people who choose to drink themselves into states of alcoholic stupor and who become oppressive and abusive while drunk, who are oppressive and abusive when they are recovering from being drunk and who can only associate friendship with alcohol.
I have seen loved ones:
sick and vomiting;
blacked out on floors and on furniture;
laughed at by their friends
have no recall of their actions;
hung over for days;
start fights with family and with me;
drive while drunk;
endanger others lives;
be emotionally wrecked;
miss work while hung over;
be constantly exhausted and angry;
in total denial of their alcohol problem
I have been repeatedly shown and told that drinking is more important than my marriage.
I have been degraded, humiliated, insulted and mocked by alcoholics.
I have been instructed to not broach the subject of alcoholism in our family.
I have been repeatedly shown that drinking and suffering blackouts and hangovers is more important than even going to church on Sundays.
I have been repeatedly shown that more time is dedicated to and unquestionably reserved for drinking each week than is reserved for family and church and God.
On the 4th of July, 2009 the final incentive was given to me by being surrounded by people who have a greater love of drinking than they have for their own health and well being. I saw friends and family drink until they blacked out but not before they made fools of themselves and had their inebriated friends laugh at their condition. Then they all drove home.
This was not the first occurrence of this but it will be my last attendance of this. Life is too short to waste time on drunks and hangovers and the abuse and self destruction that flows from them.
As of today:
I will not enable the alcoholic life choice for anyone and I will not participate in it.
I will not pay for the purchase beer, wine, whiskey or any other drinking alcohol for consumption by anyone.
I will not pay for any alcohol consumed during dinners out, for and gift alcohol and for any alcohol brought into the house for parties, dinners and other occasions. This includes alcohol purchased for consumption by “responsible,
casual drinkers” and family members.
I will not pay for alcohol purchased along with groceries in supermarkets that sell alcohol.
I will not support or welcome alcohol being brought into our house.
I will not attend personal or social events where, historically, family and friends get drunk.
I will ensure that any alcohol that is brought into my home is removed by the owner when he/she leaves or I will
dispose of it.
I will consider gifts of alcohol to be what they are. They are poison for my wife and they are future pain,
misery and destruction for her and for our marriage.
I will always consider how to avoid drunks and how to ensure that I can escape from situations where
family and friends are getting drunk.
I will do what I can to help those in need but I realize that some people do not want help, that they will
resent help and that they will resent me for not participating in or enabling their alcoholism.
****
Sadly, I have not held to the letter of this declaration and many arguments have arisen as the result of my stand, but it has given me some sense of control over myself and my actions. I'm still working on it all.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Leonard, Michigan
Posts: 49
Don't be sad you haven't held to this declaration-the excellent thing is that you wrote this (!!!) & that you are trying. No one is perfect or able to do everything perfectly as we'd like. This gave me so much inspiration, that you had these thoughts & wrote these words for me to read-thank you.
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