Been a while

Old 11-15-2011, 06:19 PM
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Been a while

Just an update. And hoping for a few virtual hugs.

RAH was sober for almost nine months. Didn't fix our issues, and I took a job on the east coast so we could both get some clarity/work on ourselves.

We decided to regroup in a few months. I took the new job and went up to look at apartments yesterday. Last night he called.

"I need to talk to my best friend."

I knew that second. Relapse.

The signs were there. Withdrawing. No AA meetings.

Just didn't think he would do it.

Filing for divorce on Friday. Moving up here next Saturday. Not what I envisioned. Really thought we could get it sorted out if he could get the help he needs for his emotional issues. Should've known better.

Anyway, my ultimate point here is to get some hugs. And to say if you are looking for your sign to leave, let me be your sign. Nine months. Things weren't perfect, but I had hopes we would get there. Now I get to start over which is amazing and terrifying at the same time.

Thanks for letting me "speak."
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:16 PM
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:39 PM
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That totally sucks.

Big hugs to you, and kudos for giving it a try. Nothing wrong with that.
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Old 11-15-2011, 09:09 PM
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It will get easier with time. Hang in there
Sending warm thoughts your way.
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Old 11-15-2011, 10:28 PM
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Big fat hugs.

I'm sorry. And I'm glad you've got an opportunit to put some geography between you.
Doesn't make it easy, but makes it less hard.
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Old 11-16-2011, 04:46 AM
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((((Hugs)))) and encouragement!
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Old 11-16-2011, 04:52 AM
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Sorry to hear how things worked out.

Do you have a support system for dealing with everything in your new home? I don't know if/how you approach stuff, but I'm thinking Al-anon meeting schedules? Local therapists? etc...?

I found when I moved from downstate rural to upstate urban hitting some meetings was like a little bit of home. The same love, acceptance and understanding. It sure made the transition easier.
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Old 11-16-2011, 04:54 AM
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Old 11-16-2011, 06:09 AM
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Old 11-16-2011, 06:49 AM
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I knew my sign.....last Christmas. I kept ignoring the sign until a few months after Christmas when it gob-smacked me across the back of the head! WHAM! Relapse, nasty words, right back at square one. That's when I let go.

It was very hard to let go - still having some really tough days but they are getting fewer. Things are falling into place the way they are for a reason and I just have to go with it........

Big hugs coming your way............
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Old 11-16-2011, 08:19 AM
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Old 11-16-2011, 08:41 AM
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