Need Hugs...
Need Hugs...
Today I need one of those hugs that just let you forget everything and feel loved...
I honestly do not know why I feel the way I do. I feel like bursting out in tears. I feel very sensitive and that I am not good enough. There was not a particular instance that is making me feel sad. I hate my job. I feel ugly. I feel like people are laughing at me. Is it hormones? Is it stress? I don't know. I can't figure out how to feel better.
Blah....
I honestly do not know why I feel the way I do. I feel like bursting out in tears. I feel very sensitive and that I am not good enough. There was not a particular instance that is making me feel sad. I hate my job. I feel ugly. I feel like people are laughing at me. Is it hormones? Is it stress? I don't know. I can't figure out how to feel better.
Blah....
Today I need one of those hugs that just let you forget everything and feel loved...
I honestly do not know why I feel the way I do. I feel like bursting out in tears. I feel very sensitive and that I am not good enough. There was not a particular instance that is making me feel sad. I hate my job. I feel ugly. I feel like people are laughing at me. Is it hormones? Is it stress? I don't know. I can't figure out how to feel better.
Blah....
I honestly do not know why I feel the way I do. I feel like bursting out in tears. I feel very sensitive and that I am not good enough. There was not a particular instance that is making me feel sad. I hate my job. I feel ugly. I feel like people are laughing at me. Is it hormones? Is it stress? I don't know. I can't figure out how to feel better.
Blah....
But, on the good side, I have a warm, snuggly beagle/spaniel waiting in bed for me. Like Charlie Brown said: :Happiness is a warm puppy."
Here's a big : from me and the pup.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Right here, right now!
Posts: 3,424
Overall I have been doing pretty well in my recovery. Separated a little over a year, working pretty hard on me.
I started a great training 10 days ago, and I am getting ready to start a meditation course next week. I felt safe, loved and supported in the training, did a good job of self care etc.
For the first time ever I feel really grounded and congruent.
That feels great.
So now that I feel pretty settled and rooted, all of these really hard feelings come up. I got in the car after the training...and started crying (they were having a celebration of my FIL's life work that it was not appropriate to attend), he passed in 2009 and that is when all the craziness really hit. It has been a struggle off and on all week. Crying, feeling better, crying, better etc. It feels lonely, and at times like it will never end.
I know that if I judge it it will only get worse, and it is hard enough.
Hugs and warm thoughts to you. I know it does get better and easier...even if it does not feel like it right now.
I love one of the sayings on here about the difference between a bad day and a good day...is one day.
I started a great training 10 days ago, and I am getting ready to start a meditation course next week. I felt safe, loved and supported in the training, did a good job of self care etc.
For the first time ever I feel really grounded and congruent.
That feels great.
So now that I feel pretty settled and rooted, all of these really hard feelings come up. I got in the car after the training...and started crying (they were having a celebration of my FIL's life work that it was not appropriate to attend), he passed in 2009 and that is when all the craziness really hit. It has been a struggle off and on all week. Crying, feeling better, crying, better etc. It feels lonely, and at times like it will never end.
I know that if I judge it it will only get worse, and it is hard enough.
Hugs and warm thoughts to you. I know it does get better and easier...even if it does not feel like it right now.
I love one of the sayings on here about the difference between a bad day and a good day...is one day.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 152
HUGS!!!!!!!!
Dont worry, you aren't alone in feeling that way! I've totally been struggling some days too, but all you have to remember is just to take itty bitty baby steps everyday and with everything! Don't be too hard on yourself and try to do the things that DO make you feel good/ good about yourself
Dont worry, you aren't alone in feeling that way! I've totally been struggling some days too, but all you have to remember is just to take itty bitty baby steps everyday and with everything! Don't be too hard on yourself and try to do the things that DO make you feel good/ good about yourself
Here is a long, solid, warm, relaxing, loving hug. This hug does not end prematurely. This hug will make you sleepy. This hug will make you feel as snug and cozy as a kitten in a fur slipper. This hug will take the edge off for a little. But if you want me to let go you have to promise to lie down and watch friends reruns with me.
HUUUUUUGS
HUUUUUUGS
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: rural west
Posts: 1,375
I could use one of those, too, so we can hug one another!
Every day is a one at a time day lately for me, too.
My new favorite quote from Gray's Anatomy is "Happiness is not the goal. Feeling horrible and knowing you are not going to die is the goal."
I think about that and how even this level of ache in my chest and sad and don't want out of bed and who cares and I can't get myself to floss is SURVIVABLE and will pass.
I think about that a lot. I don't FEEL better, but it helps a little to know it is just a feeling that will pass.
It might take a while...a long time, even, but it WILL pass.
Hugs
Every day is a one at a time day lately for me, too.
My new favorite quote from Gray's Anatomy is "Happiness is not the goal. Feeling horrible and knowing you are not going to die is the goal."
I think about that and how even this level of ache in my chest and sad and don't want out of bed and who cares and I can't get myself to floss is SURVIVABLE and will pass.
I think about that a lot. I don't FEEL better, but it helps a little to know it is just a feeling that will pass.
It might take a while...a long time, even, but it WILL pass.
Hugs
Thanks everyone for the warm hugs. I really needed that, and I sure would enjoy a night of Friends reruns. Tender hugs back to all of you. You all have touched my heart in many ways.
I have to tell myself that this feeling shall pass...
Since I posted I have been trying to go easy on myself and get out of this funk. I have been snuggled on the couch with my little chiweenie dog, Twixie, nestled next to me watching mass recordings of haunting shows on TV. I don't work tomorrow, and I love staying up late. ...I think maybe I'll go take a nice, relaxing bubble bath, and then read a book.
I have to tell myself that this feeling shall pass...
Since I posted I have been trying to go easy on myself and get out of this funk. I have been snuggled on the couch with my little chiweenie dog, Twixie, nestled next to me watching mass recordings of haunting shows on TV. I don't work tomorrow, and I love staying up late. ...I think maybe I'll go take a nice, relaxing bubble bath, and then read a book.
I was here reading everyone's wonderful replies and thinking that maybe why we are feeling the way we do when we get into these "funks" is that after stuffing our feelings deep down for so long, we are actually feeling these emotions now. They may make us feel blue, but they're there.
MTS-I'm with you-A good book, a bubble bath, good TV shows or movies are all wonderful antidotes to combat those feelings!!!
MTS-I'm with you-A good book, a bubble bath, good TV shows or movies are all wonderful antidotes to combat those feelings!!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Right here, right now!
Posts: 3,424
I agree, and as hard as they feel I know stuffing them will only be worse.
When I stuff they ferment and explode later, bigger and worse than before.
I am not necessarily grateful that I am feeling these feelings, but I am grateful that I feel safe enough to feel them and not have to stuff them.
When I stuff they ferment and explode later, bigger and worse than before.
I am not necessarily grateful that I am feeling these feelings, but I am grateful that I feel safe enough to feel them and not have to stuff them.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: California
Posts: 693
I was here reading everyone's wonderful replies and thinking that maybe why we are feeling the way we do when we get into these "funks" is that after stuffing our feelings deep down for so long, we are actually feeling these emotions now. They may make us feel blue, but they're there.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 837
Maybe we're feeling this way because one season has ended and a new one is beginning. It always brings both sadness and expectations. I've been having a hard time not crying every time someone asks me how am I doing? I tell myself once he's gone the end of this month my new season will begin but his just might end, ugh.
Hope that helps. I was feeling a little depressed this morning but a couple of walks have helped. Walking seems to be one of my best serenity tools, especially this time of year when it's starting to cool off and some of the leaves are beginning to change colors.
Take it easy on yourself and remember this too shall pass.
Your friend,
((HUGS))
I love hugs. Did you know human beings need 20 hugs A DAY? I am not getting even one!
And "me too" to everything. These days seem harder in many ways. I am lighting a candle every night, and giving my life to HP.
Today I went to rehab, worked, spent time with people I like and people I donīt like that much. I enjoyed the day anyway. It was a sunny, beautiful day. Weather was perfect. I walked and I was grateful
1 for being alive
2 for being able to walk
3 for having the sensibility to realize how wonderful it was
Most days are not like these but I agree its all feelings, we are human beings, we will always have feelings, reminding myself I am something else other than my feelings (and other than my judgments) is a practice that is giving me peace...
I am finding solace reading Zen books and Buddhist books...
I love hugs. Did you know human beings need 20 hugs A DAY? I am not getting even one!
And "me too" to everything. These days seem harder in many ways. I am lighting a candle every night, and giving my life to HP.
Today I went to rehab, worked, spent time with people I like and people I donīt like that much. I enjoyed the day anyway. It was a sunny, beautiful day. Weather was perfect. I walked and I was grateful
1 for being alive
2 for being able to walk
3 for having the sensibility to realize how wonderful it was
Most days are not like these but I agree its all feelings, we are human beings, we will always have feelings, reminding myself I am something else other than my feelings (and other than my judgments) is a practice that is giving me peace...
I am finding solace reading Zen books and Buddhist books...
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