September 12 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON
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September 12 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON
September 12 in The Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:
When an Al-Anon member undertakes to give advice, it is important to remember that it should be limited to helping the other person in terms of spiritual growth. There is danger in going beyond this and advising action to be taken. None of us have the right to do this.
Sometimes a frustrated neurotic gives advice that stirs up hostility between a man and wife. She may make the situation much worse by justifying the wife’s resentment. Promoting such resentments can have serious consequences. So, too, can urging her to “stand up for her rights” or “not to allow this or that.” She is getting unconscious satisfaction from managing other people’s lives, while she imagines her intentions are only good.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Heaven protect me from my good friends who, with only the best intentions, keep the wounds of my resentment open, weaken me by their pity, and justify my complaints. In the name of doing good, they can hamper my restoring a tolerant and loving relationship with my family.
“We must not be easy in giving credit to every word and suggestion, but carefully and leisurely weigh the matter according to God.” – (Thomas A’Kempis)
When an Al-Anon member undertakes to give advice, it is important to remember that it should be limited to helping the other person in terms of spiritual growth. There is danger in going beyond this and advising action to be taken. None of us have the right to do this.
Sometimes a frustrated neurotic gives advice that stirs up hostility between a man and wife. She may make the situation much worse by justifying the wife’s resentment. Promoting such resentments can have serious consequences. So, too, can urging her to “stand up for her rights” or “not to allow this or that.” She is getting unconscious satisfaction from managing other people’s lives, while she imagines her intentions are only good.
TODAY’S REMINDER
Heaven protect me from my good friends who, with only the best intentions, keep the wounds of my resentment open, weaken me by their pity, and justify my complaints. In the name of doing good, they can hamper my restoring a tolerant and loving relationship with my family.
“We must not be easy in giving credit to every word and suggestion, but carefully and leisurely weigh the matter according to God.” – (Thomas A’Kempis)
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