OnMyWay11

Arrrggghhhhh!!! Does it never end?? I changed my cell number so XABF cannot send me his ever-so-loving texts when he is trashed so what is his response??? Well I found out yesterday when my boss sat with me to tell me that the ****** ****** is now calling HIM. Sweet XABF felt the need to provide my boss with a list of reasons I should not be working here. Oh and every time he called he was so drunk my boss could not even follow that he was saying. That is just so low on so many levels. I could easily have gotten him fired had I contacted his company with the threatening texts and call I get from their company cell phone. I would not touch his work like that.

I know he expected me to shoot off a scathing text to him telling him to stop. Then he would have my new number. That is exactly what I would have done two weeks ago. Instead I took a deep breath, took a step back and explained to my boss what is going on. He and I are very similar so we ended up discussing the key points in the book Codependent No More. LOL. I am reading it and he has read it before. I am lucky that my boss understands.

I feel better to just get it off my chest. (((((sigh)))) Thanks for listening

breakingglass

i think that's great! and you are lucky to have an understanding boss. i do too. and it really does help. i'm still married and living with my AH. but i do have one foot out the door so its only a matter of time before i say "enough". they play on our weaknesses and we let them.... i am trying not to let that happen anymore.

i'm trying to find an al-anon class nearby my home.....the only one is specifically for gay people.... not getting that one!

Seren

Can your boss report him to the police for harrassment? Just a thought......

OnMyWay11

I could report him to the police. I have an anti-stalking/harassment order against him, which extends to my co-workers. But, if I do that he will lose his job (again) and have all day to focus on his harassment of me. I weighed the pros and cons of it and feel my own safety is better served by detaching from his shenanigans. The fact that my boss understands and is just ignoring the calls helps a lot. The campus police are aware of the situation and will arrest him if they see him near my office or see his car in one of the parking lots.

theuncertainty

OnMyWay11, I just found out that I should have reported XAAH to the POLICE (not my attorney) for even the stupid text message he sent me saying he was home and 'love you' as a violation of our no contact order. I know the situation is not the same and I'm not saying there is DV involved with your case, but the police recommend reporting for even the 'smallest' infraction of a RO or no contact order.

The order against him will only work if you report. It's not up to you to protect his job. It's not your reporting that would threaten his job, it's his stalkerish and inappropriate behavior that does.