transformyself

I got completely drunk with my sisters last night, we're all on vacation at my Dads house for the week, it' something I do once every year or so when my sisters and I are all together. I laughed my ass off last night, it's like a roller coaster, getting drunk. But today I can barely function and they're laughing at what a lightweight I am.

I'm so confused about alcoholics today. Why would anyone do this to themselves every day? Once a year is too much. It's like a roller coaster to retardation.

Sure we had fun, I'll laugh about it for a long while, but the effects on my body are horrendous. I'm swollen, dizzy, feel like throwing up, headache, emotional. I keep thinking about AH and how he must feel this way EVERY DAY.

At first it gave me some empathy for him, to realized that he's so pickled he can't act right, can't process emotions correctly, but then I realized this is something he does to himself, day after day, now I think he's an even bigger idiot. If you're stupid enough to do this to yourself then you can bear the consequences.

So what's the deal? Can alcoholics stop drinking? Or is it that by definition, an A can't stop drinking that's what makes them alcoholic? How then can some get and stay sober?

What the heck is wrong with them? Why would anyone do this to themselves voluntarily?

I realized these are rhetorical, but I would really like to hear from some of the recovering As as to what is so attractive about drinking this much? Don't you feel like crap the next day? Why keep doing it?

I"m not trying to offend anyone, just seriously confused.

kmangel

I imagine that an alcoholic will fix their resultant hangover with more alcohol--so they don't feel so bad. You, though, just tough it out and deal with feeling bad.

Fandy

you've offended me very much by trivializing what you THINK is alcoholism. It comes across as you are "holier than thou".... I'm sure that you are so perfect you can only imagine why people are"idiots".

transformyself

Kmangel I was thinking the same thing. That the "fix" would be to keep drinking.

Does that mean I could become an A, if I chose to fix this brutal hangover with more booze?

I thought I understood alcoholism, but now feel like it's only through the codependent lens.

Freedom1990

Alcoholism has nothing to do with stupidity. Alcoholics drink because they suffer from a compulsion to drink, despite the consequences.

suki44883

I didn't have hangovers the last few years of my drinking career. Maybe you feel so crappy because you put a lot of something in your body that it isn't used to. Alcoholics feel a lot like you do today if they DON'T put that something in their body that it not only is used to, but demands.

transformyself

I went over to the Amy Winehouse thread, and found lots of wisdom about the nature of A over there. Some called it a mental illness, others commented on how Alcoholics dont' come with a warning label that says, "alcoholic do not allow to drink booze."

l think what's happening to me is a different perspective, having gotten so drunk last night. I've been working my program, working on accepting that I can't change it or control it at all. But having tried it out like this, makes it even more baffling- as does my own disease. Same questions could be applied to my issues with my A, why on earth did I stay, and go back to him, time after time? AFter experiencing the horrible "hangovers" of abuse and neglect from him.

Weird, all of it. Cunning baffling powerful.

dollydo

As you stated:

"What the heck is wrong with them? Why would anyone do this to themselves voluntarily?"

So my question is why would anyone spend years with an alcoholic? What is the reason you are still married to your alcoholic husband?

I too, found your post to be offensive.

transformyself

Ok that makes a little more sense. The compulsion is stronger than the consequences. Nicely summed up. thank you.

ANEWAUGUST

Alcoholism is a disease.

I was sick because I drank, and I drank because I was sick.

My body metabolizes alcohol differently then a normal person, a normal drinker. My tolerance was higher then a normal person. I couldn't moderate my drinking. I tried, God knows how hard I tried. I didn't choose to become an alcoholic like my father...but my DNA is wired differently.

You might want to read the Big Book, or another book Under the Influence that more accurately describes this disease.

Whats wrong with alcoholics?

They suffer from a disease.

ANEWAUGUST

The more I have thought about this post, the more questions raced thru my mind.

I am on this section of the board because my father was an alcoholic, I also have husband that is a weekend warrior. I am also an alcoholic.

I would have LOVED for my father to find a recovery program, such as AA. The last 20 years of his life he didn't drink, he also didn't have the spiritual set of tools a program can provide to use when he hit "dry drunk" periods of his life.

Just as we all want the alcoholic in a solid program of recovery, the family and loved ones need a solid program. It is not just about co-dependency...is it about alcoholism, a family disease.

So..my suggestion is to educate yourself about this disease before you toss out statements that are insensitive.

transformyself

This is a good one, thanks, I'll tuck it away and use it for the next, inevitable round of insensitive statements in response to various codependent posts. You know, when codies post about the ongoing battle they have with leaving their A, and they are gang-ridiculed by, well, mainly the folks who are so offended by my questions..

DesertEyes

Okay people, chill out.

The reason _we_ are here is because we are in great emotional pain. Kindly respond to each other with kindness, and if you are not able to be kind then go take a walk. Breathe some air. Watch TV. Come back tomorrow when you feel better.

This thread is now closed

Mike
Moderator, SR