Getting married, & scared
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 11
do not marry this guy-is this the kind of man you want to be a father to your children??? don't do it-I wish i had listened to the little voice inside my head 22 years ago and then wouldn't be in the jam i am now...run, run as fast as you can!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 141
Originally Posted by skippernlilg 
Just for information: The American Psychological Association refers to the DSM IV to categorize psychological and behaviorial disorders. Codependency remains undefined in their criteria of listing.
I did not suggest there is a 'diagnosis' of codependency; however, I did suggest there are clear commonalities of codependent behaviors in an alcoholic/addicts family life. This is a constant as far as sociological behaviorial study. I also suggested self-examination, not self-diagnosis.
To illustrate my thought further, there is no scientific evidence that diet supplements/vitamins slow aging or increase life expectancy. Yet, we have determined a certain formula for a certain group of people may be helpful to them. It actually seems to be helpful. If it helps, why would we advise otherwise?
I did not suggest there is a 'diagnosis' of codependency; however, I did suggest there are clear commonalities of codependent behaviors in an alcoholic/addicts family life. This is a constant as far as sociological behaviorial study. I also suggested self-examination, not self-diagnosis.
To illustrate my thought further, there is no scientific evidence that diet supplements/vitamins slow aging or increase life expectancy. Yet, we have determined a certain formula for a certain group of people may be helpful to them. It actually seems to be helpful. If it helps, why would we advise otherwise?
And just because you did not explicitly state "diagnosis" does not mean that it was not implied. All you have to do is read through the threads and you will find time and time again, new comers are being pressured to read certain "codependent" books and label themselves codependent. I can't even count the number of times I have observed this. Again, that is not to say that codependency does not exist, but only that such a strong label should not be subscribed to so effortlessly.
I do value your opinion Skipper, and I think that you have good intentions. I can certainly see that you are trying to help others and that you yourself have felt helped by certain resources and you want to pass it on. And certainly in this case I can see that many feel fear for this young lady who seems be on a troubled path. But, I think that in fairness there are other options other than labeling oneself codependent and finding the nearest exit.
And as far as vitamins and supplements go - there is ample scientific evidence that taking vitamins and certain supplements prolongs a person's life. I should know - I have every vitamin and supplement known to man and I plan on living a very long time!
No hard feelings -
Panther
peaceful seabird
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: floating
Posts: 4,822
I agree.
Remember we are here to offer our experience, strength and hope to members seeking support.
Speaking to another member about something posted on a thread is hijacking the thread from the OP (original poster's) concerns.
Please keep your comments directed toward the original topic.
Remember we are here to offer our experience, strength and hope to members seeking support.
Speaking to another member about something posted on a thread is hijacking the thread from the OP (original poster's) concerns.
Please keep your comments directed toward the original topic.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,944
Salamand, I wish you all the best moving forward with your family. May you have the peace and joy you deserve.
Since this thread has outlived it's benefit and members are beginning to address one another--not the original poster--I am closing it.
Since this thread has outlived it's benefit and members are beginning to address one another--not the original poster--I am closing it.
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