Pet-Anon
A work in progress
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Pixi,
Your Pepper looks quite a bit like MY kitty (mine is named Lexie, lol, and my son's demented kitty is named Isis). Isis is all grey and black and white. Lexie is more of a tortoiseshell tabby:
Your Pepper looks quite a bit like MY kitty (mine is named Lexie, lol, and my son's demented kitty is named Isis). Isis is all grey and black and white. Lexie is more of a tortoiseshell tabby:
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 756
Aww, she does! AFAIK, Pepper's mama was a manx, several of her siblings were also found about when we found Pepper(the whole neighborhood was trying to get at least the kitties in before winter, she was part of a late litter, and we found her in mid-October) and a few of them don't have tails, and from reports I heard about her mom, she didn't have a tail either. It fits too, because Pepper is a tiny thing, very short and squat. I think I have a picture of her somewhere in the Christmas tree too. LOL
this is Sylvester, he's very long, lean and muscular. I do hate that I can't bring him with, I'm hoping if things go downhill too much here, that the inlaws will take him back(MIL originally found him outside her house, but didn't think she could keep him at the time, so she talked me into taking him, AH was deployed at the time)
And his polydactyl-ism makes him look like he has thumbs. LOL
this is Sylvester, he's very long, lean and muscular. I do hate that I can't bring him with, I'm hoping if things go downhill too much here, that the inlaws will take him back(MIL originally found him outside her house, but didn't think she could keep him at the time, so she talked me into taking him, AH was deployed at the time)
And his polydactyl-ism makes him look like he has thumbs. LOL
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alaska
Posts: 2,913
Awww, Lexie, she's a beauty and looks so content. And I love the other photos that are shared here.
Here's a photo of Sasuke after he and DS commandeered my storage cubby while I was digging for a hat. Sasuke jumped right in and laid down, DS said, "Oh, no, that won't do, Sasuke," and put Sasuke on the floor until he put in the kitty blanket for Sasuke to lay on. "OK, boy." and back went Sasuke.
Dollydo, your post about your XABF's anger and it's affect on the pups made me cry. I lost 4 kitties when I left XAH. The youngest one died the first time I left XAH, and then XAH wouldn't let me take any of the others the next time I left him and now he doesn't have them either. I know his GF had one of them put down, but I don't know which one or where the other 2 are or if they're still alive. He wouldn't tell me. He just said "They're gone." I hope he thought giving them away was enough of a punishment for me.
Yes, pets are definitely affected by alcoholism and abuse in their family, too. Baby Girl, one of our 'missing' cats, was the protector in the family. She'd stand by DS when XAH got angry or drank a lot; the other cats would hunker down. One would hide for days.
Here's a photo of Sasuke after he and DS commandeered my storage cubby while I was digging for a hat. Sasuke jumped right in and laid down, DS said, "Oh, no, that won't do, Sasuke," and put Sasuke on the floor until he put in the kitty blanket for Sasuke to lay on. "OK, boy." and back went Sasuke.
Dollydo, your post about your XABF's anger and it's affect on the pups made me cry. I lost 4 kitties when I left XAH. The youngest one died the first time I left XAH, and then XAH wouldn't let me take any of the others the next time I left him and now he doesn't have them either. I know his GF had one of them put down, but I don't know which one or where the other 2 are or if they're still alive. He wouldn't tell me. He just said "They're gone." I hope he thought giving them away was enough of a punishment for me.
Yes, pets are definitely affected by alcoholism and abuse in their family, too. Baby Girl, one of our 'missing' cats, was the protector in the family. She'd stand by DS when XAH got angry or drank a lot; the other cats would hunker down. One would hide for days.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Cats are cool. And they even tolerate their pet humans now and then 
As far as cats with issues, there are animal therapists. ( I know, I used to date one ) They're hard to find but you can start with your local vet. Most animal "issues" are really environment issues. i.e.: cats that spend too much time on your lap might just be chilly. They need their very own "lair" in a warm part of the house, but where they can keep an eye on their pet human.
Sometimes all they need is for you to toss one of your worn shirts in their "lair" every other day so they can smell you next to them. Kitties are actually a lot more sensitive about their home than they let on, so you really need to find an expert that can clue you in and do the "cat whisperer" thing.
Another trick is to get an old tube TV from the local Salvation Army, park it in a corner next to your desk and turn it on with the sound off. The warmth and the hum of the electronics are very soothing to cats. They love to lay on top of the thing and nap. But don't put the tube TV up on a furniture cuz I had a kitty called Otto that used to wake up, take a big stretch and, forgetting where he was, would roll right off the thing and bam! All the way to the floor.
Mike
As far as cats with issues, there are animal therapists. ( I know, I used to date one
) They're hard to find but you can start with your local vet. Most animal "issues" are really environment issues. i.e.: cats that spend too much time on your lap might just be chilly. They need their very own "lair" in a warm part of the house, but where they can keep an eye on their pet human. Sometimes all they need is for you to toss one of your worn shirts in their "lair" every other day so they can smell you next to them. Kitties are actually a lot more sensitive about their home than they let on, so you really need to find an expert that can clue you in and do the "cat whisperer" thing.
Another trick is to get an old tube TV from the local Salvation Army, park it in a corner next to your desk and turn it on with the sound off. The warmth and the hum of the electronics are very soothing to cats. They love to lay on top of the thing and nap. But don't put the tube TV up on a furniture cuz I had a kitty called Otto that used to wake up, take a big stretch and, forgetting where he was, would roll right off the thing and bam! All the way to the floor.
Mike
A work in progress
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Oh, I know ALL about animal therapists. I once had to handle a case involving a woman who sicced her dog on someone of the "wrong" race who was walking through the neighborhood. The doggy shrink testified that the dog was basically too stupid to attack on command (sort of a canine insanity defense).
The dog wasn't the one with the legal problem, just the woman (who also got off, unjustly, IMO).
The dog wasn't the one with the legal problem, just the woman (who also got off, unjustly, IMO).
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Right here, right now!
Posts: 3,424
These posts have brought tears of joy to me.
I have two dogs (both of which I got in the seperation). My exAH was the dog person when we got together and it was his inconsistantcy with them that helped me to realize how bad things had become for him. I was not a dog person, but their introduction in my life was the best thing that ever happened to me.
One is a four year Golden Retriever who is just laid back and easy going. The other is a 6 year old German Shephard Dog is where I got "LifeRecovery from". She is my Life Recovery dog. When I was first starting to feel and was struggling with stuffing vs feeling she was acting out all of my emotions (unfortunately they were in less than appropriate formats)...if FORCED me to look at my stuff though and it has been an amazing journey for us as a result. I found an amazing trainer for my dog, but learned that it was really training for me.
Now that I am healing her healing is amazing to witness. I cannot imagine my life without either of my dogs, but I cannot imagine my healing without her. On the other hand now that a lot of the work is done I always have my Golden to remind me to loosen up and play.
Great idea for a post.
I have two dogs (both of which I got in the seperation). My exAH was the dog person when we got together and it was his inconsistantcy with them that helped me to realize how bad things had become for him. I was not a dog person, but their introduction in my life was the best thing that ever happened to me.
One is a four year Golden Retriever who is just laid back and easy going. The other is a 6 year old German Shephard Dog is where I got "LifeRecovery from". She is my Life Recovery dog. When I was first starting to feel and was struggling with stuffing vs feeling she was acting out all of my emotions (unfortunately they were in less than appropriate formats)...if FORCED me to look at my stuff though and it has been an amazing journey for us as a result. I found an amazing trainer for my dog, but learned that it was really training for me.
Now that I am healing her healing is amazing to witness. I cannot imagine my life without either of my dogs, but I cannot imagine my healing without her. On the other hand now that a lot of the work is done I always have my Golden to remind me to loosen up and play.
Great idea for a post.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Somewhere in the big ole' world....
Posts: 545
Pet-Anon....most definitely. My co-dependent, people-pleasing beagle-spaniel-pug mix would benefit greatly from Pet-Anon.....Had an Al-Anon member in my group who actually mentioned Al-a-Mutt because the A's in our life had AA, we had Al-Anon and kids had Al-A Teen, so our animals should have their own support group.....Heck, my boy knew the Serenity Prayer and 12 Steps by heart as I recited them.....
After reading some of the posts here, you can see just how our furry kids are affected by the disease. My boy KNEW long before me when the EX was about to relapse - he would cling to me, not let me out of his sight and when the fighting started, he would cringe next to me, alternately scared but trying to protect me-his mummy. The ex threatened him a couple of times and while he never struck him, I could see it in his eyes and I did not trust him with my boy for a very long time.
I adopted him from the ASPCA when he was 6 months old - he had previous issues, when he came to me, I wasn't in the best living situation (pre ABF), so he never really had a chance to get off of the merry go round.
Now that things have settled down and we are in a semblance of a routine, he is a lot calmer, but still sticks to me like glue. I make sure we have our walks, our play, our cuddle time and at 3+ years old, he is beginning to settle down. Now, if only I could work on his cat issues!
After reading some of the posts here, you can see just how our furry kids are affected by the disease. My boy KNEW long before me when the EX was about to relapse - he would cling to me, not let me out of his sight and when the fighting started, he would cringe next to me, alternately scared but trying to protect me-his mummy. The ex threatened him a couple of times and while he never struck him, I could see it in his eyes and I did not trust him with my boy for a very long time.
I adopted him from the ASPCA when he was 6 months old - he had previous issues, when he came to me, I wasn't in the best living situation (pre ABF), so he never really had a chance to get off of the merry go round.
Now that things have settled down and we are in a semblance of a routine, he is a lot calmer, but still sticks to me like glue. I make sure we have our walks, our play, our cuddle time and at 3+ years old, he is beginning to settle down. Now, if only I could work on his cat issues!
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 1,637
AW, lexie.... Your crazy cat looks identical to my sweet Veronica! She too was on the small side... Everyone thought she was a kitten even though she was 17 yrs old! Roni was my sisters cat first but I adopted her to keep me company when I moved halfway across the country! She and I lived together longer than me and any guy I've ever been with!
The kids and I miss her so much. My daughter has a framed picture of her on the nightstand... And talks nonstop about wanting another kitty. But, that wont happen as long as we are living with AH.
You folks are giving me another good reason for wanting out of this living arrangement!!
I wish I knew how to post pictures...
The kids and I miss her so much. My daughter has a framed picture of her on the nightstand... And talks nonstop about wanting another kitty. But, that wont happen as long as we are living with AH.
You folks are giving me another good reason for wanting out of this living arrangement!!
I wish I knew how to post pictures...
A work in progress
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Just click on "go advanced" and scroll down to "manage attachments". There, you can upload straight from your computer (I recommend using "preview" after that to make sure the pics aren't too huge, rotated wrong, etc.)
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 756
Oh yeah, Dusty will protect me when AH is at his worst, and he can be MEAN(we think he's part Catahoula, which are known as protectors) Casey, who is thoroughly his dog, will stare him down when he's doing it too, so those two are obviously affected. I don't know about the younger two, it has been awhile since a rant session(thankfully! I'm not complaining or anything)
I do feel for what will happen to the dogs when i leave and if he chooses not to get sober. Unfortunately I can't let that rule my decision.
I do feel for what will happen to the dogs when i leave and if he chooses not to get sober. Unfortunately I can't let that rule my decision.
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