SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/)
-   Friends and Family of Alcoholics (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/)
-   -   Starting over.... again, and again. (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/228199-starting-over-again-again.html)

DesertEyes 05-29-2011 04:29 PM

Starting over.... again, and again.
 
Starting over.... again, and again.

I've heard in meetings that the fastest way to make the HP laugh is to tell Him your plans. Well, my HP must think I'm a comedian headlining at a Vegas casino the way my plans keep falling apart.

First, I had planned to live happily ever after with my lovely wife. We had three small companies moving along nicely, a beautiful little house and a perfect life. Then she got very ill, got addicted to pain pills, the economy went south along with the companies and it all fell apart. Twenty years of marriage ended, and that hurt.

I moved to Las Vegas, got divorced, and started over. Got a new career going, made tons of new friends, met a fantastic young lady and we set up house in a charming little condo. I was all settled in and back on track for that happily ever after deal.

Well.... young lady is recovering from a nasty eating disorder, except that she wasn't all that recovering. Turns out it was more like some times recovering sometimes not. Economy kept going downhill and there went the company I was working for. By now I had learned a mountain of recovery skills from al-anon and this wonderful forum, so I set some boundaries and stuck to them. Young lady decided she'd rather get high on not eating, along with ocassional explosions of violent temper, etc., etc. I don't have to explain to you guys what it's like living with an addict. That lasted only 6 years, so I'm getting better at this.

My company closed up the shop and laid off all 200 employees. I did some verbal arm-twisting and threatening cuz they wanted us all out of the building and gone in 3 days. No severance, no transfers, no nothing. ( I learned a lot about manipulation and verbal games from living with _two_ addicts over the years, so there are _some_ benefits to being a codie ;) )

The economy in Las Vegas has been going from terrible to worse, and I have always kept an eye on the job market. There's just _nothing_. I know guys my age who are lucky to work graveyard as limo drivers, and have to get 3 or 4 roomates and still have trouble paying the rent. With all my health problems, that was not an option for me. So I managed a transfer within the same company, out of Las Vegas and alllllllll the way over to Virginia.

They gave me 3 days to move, or else. I called their bluff and managed to get out here in 3 weeks. Bounced around from one hotel to another chasing discounts untill I got an apartment and finally got internet access again.

This is a whole different world from where I come from. I am having major culture shock. For one thing, they have these major downpours every few days ( they call them "drizzle" ) and then the lights go out ( they call it a "blackout" ). I learned how to operate an "umbrella" and that people go to work on a "metro". They don't even have parking lots downtown !!!! It's like these people just don't know how to live with a car.

They talk funny too ;)

So hear I am. Starting a new life.... again. Have met some interesting people here and there. Will make friends in time. The meetings are much smaller, but it's the same program and the same feeling of acceptance. I am going to stay away from "happily ever after" and all that stuff for awhile. I really suck at it and it hurts like ****** when it blows up in my face.

On the other hand, the good times have been fantastic and I wouldn't trade that for anything. My life has been better than I ever could have imagined, all things considered. I still have tons of boxes to unpack, a new job to get used to, a whole new bunch of doctors to find, a looooooong commute to work and all kinds of new things to learn.

Like this thing in the air they call "humidity". It's the weirdest thing, like you're walking around in a sauna all day !!!

Mike :)

Freedom1990 05-29-2011 04:32 PM

Mike!!!!!!

:ghug3 :ghug3

(I'm so danged happy to see you again that words fail me, my friend!)

suki44883 05-29-2011 04:35 PM

Good to see you, Mike! I wondered where you got yourself off too. Now, I know. Welcome back!! :hug:

Tuffgirl 05-29-2011 04:36 PM

Mike, I don't know you but I am sure over time I will. Your post made me laugh out loud, thanks! So true - God laughs while we make plans - I remind myself of this every day.

~T

dollydo 05-29-2011 04:37 PM

Wow, must be a shock to your system going from no humidty to a sauna.

Enjoy your new life!

Latte 05-29-2011 04:41 PM

I am so glad to see you again. It's nice to "see" people that have been here since I showed up-and longer.

LaPinturaBella 05-29-2011 04:43 PM

Mike, I don't know you either. But I like your attitude. I hope you enjoy this adventure HP has set you on. :-D

Dee74 05-29-2011 05:30 PM

It's great to see you back Mike :)

D

Alone22 05-29-2011 05:38 PM

Great post! I don't know you either but I can tell I'm going to learn a lot from your experiences. Thanks for making it back here.

catlovermi 05-29-2011 05:48 PM

I am so happy to hear you got a job transfer and have a job! That is a big one - an income to live from!

I've lived in most the corners and middles of this country and there are wonderful people throughout if you pick 'em right!

Now you can enjoy lush, green, abundant landscape, smooth skin (from the humidity, that is), four distinct seasons, and new regional cuisine!

Good to hear from you, again.

CLMI

chicory 05-29-2011 05:50 PM

(((Mike)))

So glad that you are back! Your kindness was much missed. Glad things are going well. I must say I am so jealous- I love the mountains of Virginia. You must feel like you are in a jungle, after the wide open spaces and dry air out in Vegas.

really good to "see" you again.:wavey:

hugs
chicory

Fandy 05-29-2011 05:55 PM

I'm glad you landed on your feet Mike....as for Virginia weather....wait until you hit NJ and the winter.....i had the heat on 10 days ago, now it's 90...drippy, humid with giant mosquitos...i feel chewed on.

i hope that life treats you well....good luck with adjusting to the job, weather and culture shock.

frankly 05-29-2011 06:42 PM

((((Mike))))

I'm no stranger to new beginnings. Until I realized, every single day is a new beginning. I know for a fact, that you will be all right. I really did have to chuckle. Sin City to Virginia is really an understatement of culture shock. Just think about all the beautiful pictures that you will be able to take. Live every single day to the fullest.

Hugs and Prayers Bro
B

CatsPajamas 05-29-2011 07:11 PM

Hey partner - glad you checked in. I have been thinking about you a lot and almost picked up the phone a time or 2 to talk to you. I might still!

I'm glad to hear that you're settling in. It's a lot of new adjustments, but you know the drill and have all of the tools to help you through this. I'm confident that your HP has you right where you're supposed to be, and I really look forward to hearing how your new life unfolds. It will be fuller, richer, happier and better that you ever imagined. How do I know this? Because that's how it works my friend, when you're fully present in your life and paying attention to your HP along the way.

Hugs and love my friend
Cats

MayaandMe 05-29-2011 07:17 PM

So glad to see you back around these parts!

barb dwyer 05-29-2011 07:46 PM

****{Mike}}}

glad to finally see you!

hope you can get set up with a new doc soon,
the humidity is gonna play havoc with arthritis for a while
till you acclimate to the humidity.

great to see you sorry for the problems but glad you're back!

Impurrfect 05-29-2011 08:05 PM

(((Mike)))) - I've MISSED you!!! :Val004: I just KNEW you'd figure out how to use an umbrella:)

Glad to hear that you are getting settled down, and are back online. Your awesome attitude always makes me feel like I can conquer the world, once I read your posts.

Praying you find good doctors (if not, VA is not that far from me, and I CAN come up there and be nurse ratchet until you find the right ones!!). I'm not worried about you making lots of friends, just because of who you are.

Make sure to keep taking care of you....you are a true treasure in my life, as well as many others.

Love, hugs, and prayers,

Amy

smacked 05-29-2011 08:27 PM

You've been missed, friend. So glad you're back!

Pelican 05-30-2011 04:49 AM

Great to *see* you again Mike!

Thank you for giving us an update on you. I am happy that you made the transfer to Virginia and have found housing.

I'm sure that your co-workers and fellow alanoids will love you as much as we do! You are inspiring, sincere, wise, and gracious.

I believe you will find lots of new photo opportunities in your community. (after you and your camera lense adjust to the humidity)

I thought I might share a find on some of the local wildlife in Virginia: Eastern Hellbender

Keep on keepin on!


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 02:56 AM.