putmeontheair

First of all, please forgive me as I am typing this on my phone.

Second of all, thank you to the person who recommended Empowered Recovery.

I am afraid to leave for many reasons, but the main one is fear of failure ... fear of quitting. Well I read some of this eBook, and here is why I quit.

I quit because I want an equal relationship.

I am a quitter because I am tired of shouldering the financial responsibility.

I quit because I want a relationship where communication is open.

I quit because I want to trust my "R"AH and can't.

I am a quitter because I want to enjoy what I have earned.

I am a quitter because I want a partnership.

I am a quitter because I don't think relationships should be this hard.

I quit because this is not the life I imagined for myself.

I am a quitter because I know I deserve better.

I quit because I don't want your sobriety on my shoulders.

I quit because I don't want a dysfunctional life.

I quit because I want to be happy.

What is on YOUR quit list?

Tuffgirl

Guess I am a quitter, too.

Thumper

I quit ignoring my inner voice.

I quit trying to make someone into a person they were not.

I quit accepting the unacceptable.

I quit feeling trapped, powerless, and out of control.

I quit crying in the shower.

I quit feeling defeated.

I quit ignoring my own needs.

I quit being afraid.

I quit thinking of myself in negative ways.

I quit being responsible for everyone else and started being responsible for myself.

You have a very good list. It is empowering to be able to say those things. Good!! Mine is a little different only because I'm already gone. My list today is about me.

Before I left my list looked almost exactly like yours. I word to the wise. It was a few *years* after that before I actually left. I wouldn't recommend waiting around that long because they aren't joking when they say nothing changes and alcoholism progresses. Living with that list, but not changing my situation, was really and truly the worst thing I've ever done to myself.

putmeontheair

Thanks Thumper. Haven't left yet but getting there. Either there will be a miracle from God or I will be gone and the end of the month. Betting the latter but I am peaceful and ok with that decision. Time for me to be happy.

fighter1010

Your post just brought tears to my eyes. It is the same list i made, and the same list i look at now and know i made the right decision to leave. i'm working on all of the things on both of the lists posted. It's a long long hard road, but on the other end there is happiness, there is love, there is hope, and endless peace. I wish you the best in your decision making and know we are all here for you

BobbyJ

1 Cup of putmeontheair post
1 Cup of thumper post
(( EQUALS = ))
Bobby J is a quitter too!!!
:day6

BobbyJ

Maybe "SURVIVOR" is a more settle word, for those who
dont like to be called a quitter....

Think of pretty pink breast cancer ribbons.

Those ladies are so happy they survived and have a second chance to live.

That is me...a "SURVIVOR".....of being married to an alcoholic..

The cancer damn near killed me & my kids (Damn Near)

The cancer killed my family, marriage, dreams

The cancer is killing my husband...

BUT it will NOT continue to KILL me!!!! ( IM A SURVIVOR )...just for today!!!

sandrawg

I quit because I don't want to come in second place anymore-I want to be the main priority.

I quit because I can't keep caring more about someone than he does for himself.

I quit because I cannot watch someone I care about slowly kill himself.

I quit because I am tired of being put in difficult, dangerous positions, like dragging my bf away from a fight at the bar.

I quit because I am tired of being called "controlling" when I ask for my bf to respect my boundaries.

I quit because i am tired of being called a "second mother", simply for trying to encourage someone I care about to engage in healthy activities.

I quit because I want to invest my time and energy in my own healing, not trying to fix someone else.

Linkmeister

My EXABF called me a quitter. Somehow, I don't think this post was what he had in mind.

Yes, I AM a quitter. I AM a survivor. I AM free......

fourmaggie

loved what everyone has said...

I am a quiter too....I want my self esteem BACK!! (got it back, but at time, had zippo)

LaPinturaBella

I'M A QUITTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In this context, I'm proud to be a quitter! Who is it who said quitting is a bad thing? I'd like to show this post to him/her. Reminds me of the word SELFISH. There's bad selfish which is how the word is most often used, and there's GOOD selfish, as in taking care of yourself so have things to give to others. I'm proud to be counted among such a FINE GROUP OF EMPOWERED QUITTERS!!!

lillamy

All I can think about is this angry juvenile accusation from the movie "The Pacifier": "You know why you quit? Because you're a quitter. And everybody knows that... quitters.... QUIT!"

I quit because I realized that the voice that had told me God wanted me to stay wasn't God. It was my own pride telling me I couldn't quit because it would mean I had failed.

Alone22

LOVE it!

barb dwyer

I quit acting on what others tell me is best for me.

I quit listening to false compliments.

I quit paying attention to gossip. mostly gossip about me.

I quit getting right to the point of succeeding and then stopping.

I quit blaming anyone other than me for anything. then or now.

I quit dressing in a way that I think will make others like me.

I quit trying to figure out what other want to hear.

I quit telling others to make changes I haven't made myself.

I quit being too busy to lend a hand up to anyone in recovery.

StarCat

I am an empowered selfish quitter, too!

And I am proud of it.

I quit worrying about the entire world at the expense of my own health, happiness, sanity, and life.

kittykitty

Hi, my name is Kitty, and I'm a QUITTER!!!!!

(everyone in unison: Hi Kitty!)

Keep quitting, it works if you work it

February

I quit calling hospitals at 3 am to see if AH was in a DUI accident.
I quit telling myself and everyone else I had a wonderful marriage and other people did not know what they were talking about when they expressed concern for me.
I quit walking on eggshells.
I quit trying to anticipate what AH was going to say and do and then plan my behavior around that.
I quit waiting up for someone who wanted to snuggle a beer more than his loving wife.
I quit raising my girls in a home I couldn't even come home to until their bedtime so they wouldnt encounter daddy drunk.
I quit over explaining everything to someone who was going to find fault with it anyway, just so he would feel better about himself.
I quit trying to make AH's worldview make more sense than my common sense.
I quit making excuses for a grown man with 2 college degrees to be out of work for almost 2 years.
I quit belittling my contributions to the world, especially my daughter's upbringing.
Most recently I quit answering the phone when a scary person would not stop calling me.

Eight Ball

'Im a quitter' is going to be my new mantra

Love it and love this thread.

caaraa

I quit .........

Jadmack25

Oh goody gumdrops......I need not hang my head any longer.

Now I can stand up straight (darn the osteo) and proudly declare

"I am a QUITTER."