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Old 04-28-2011, 04:47 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by wicked View Post
Yep, they all go a long way.
For everyone.

Yep. They do. For everyone. I agree. That's why I said it. Me included.
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Old 04-28-2011, 05:00 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Heads up...if we can't refrain from personal attacks, then this thread will be closed.

Please remember that we have an ignore function, that when used is quite effective, and stops threads from repeatedly turning into bickering matches.
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Old 04-28-2011, 05:08 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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I see it like anything else, some of us have more sensitivity and compassion than others. This board is no different. But when you are dealing with such sensitive topics, yes those words can sting more and carry more weight IF YOU LET THEM. (I typed all caps because it looked hella powerful not because I am shouting.. so that is the kind of stuff I am referring to, interpetation is subjective).

It is sort of like triage here: A quick assessment of the problems from a wide range of views but the real healing happens somewhere else. Only you can protect yourself from internalizing what you percieve as negativity from strangers.

Some people I can relate to, others I cannot. I try to chose my words carefully but others type what is off the top of their heads. It is like anywhere else when a large group of people come together for a shared reason.

We aren't going to all agree & we aren't all going to like one another. Whenever I come across feedback that is acidic, I see it more as a challenge to my thinking than a personal attack. They don't know 'me' I don't know 'them', they are simply conveying their thoughts.

There are F/F boards that seem to be a bit 'softer' but they also don't have the breadth of knowledge or range of people posting that SR does. It is what it is.
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Old 04-28-2011, 05:37 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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I was thinking WTBH that I got lots of support/wisdom from group therapy in real life. I am not sure if you are going to therapy (sorry if I missed that) but the advantage there is that there is a professional guiding everyone and placing healthy boundaries. It is about confronting people with realities with respect, and its also about feeling SAFE.

Although there are wonderful people out there I do not think others alone can provide the support and knowledge needed for people that have gone through abuse (I am one of them!) .. that is why there are professionals out there and an entire field of study...

All the best.
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Old 04-28-2011, 05:41 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Hmmm hadn't even thought about group T. I have individual T but hadn't thought about group. Thanks for the idea. Much appreciated.

PS. I love your Gibran quote at the bottom of your page. The Prophet is a book I can't read enough times... always get something new from it...
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Old 04-28-2011, 08:46 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Now I'm the one being attacked.
Your sarcasm is neither refreshing, appreciated, nor constructive. Please don't ever message me again, or mention me in any of your posts.
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Old 04-29-2011, 06:15 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by kittykitty View Post
Now I'm the one being attacked.
Your sarcasm is neither refreshing, appreciated, nor constructive. Please don't ever message me again, or mention me in any of your posts.
I am sorry you feel that way. I responded to your post and gave my version of events and asked questions. And in the message I sent you KK, I told you that I re-read the post you referenced where I "attacked" you and told you that in no way was I then or am I now upset with you about anything you said in it. I apologized for the fact that I was in fact angry that day but NOT at all with you but said I understood how that could have been misinterpreted and suggested you just ask in the future to clarify before being certain that I (or anyone) was upset with you.

How that's an attack I am not sure. I hope you find what you need elsewhere on this board. I did not like how you addressed me in this thread and my response on here told you that. My personal message to you was anything but an attack. Did you take my apology as sarcastic?
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Old 04-29-2011, 08:12 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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As promised...
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