The Pain Stops
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Join Date: Nov 2008
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The Pain Stops
I was reading the thread of "When the Pain Stops" and thinking ! What a great thread and this person has such great insight.
I started tho think of some of my "When the Pain Stops". Does anyone else want to give their versiion of when the pain stops? Here are a few of mine.
THE PAIN STOPS
1. When I stop it by deciding not to listen or give into the quacking.
2. When I give up my fantasy that things will be like they were in the beginning and our lives will magically be sane again.
3. When I Let Go and really Let Go.
4. When I STOP thinking those thoughts about the A that cause me the pain and START thinking those thoughts of ME and my FUTURE. My new Life without the chaos.
5. When I finally surrender and move on with my life.
Happy Easter to Everyone. Have a great Day!!
I started tho think of some of my "When the Pain Stops". Does anyone else want to give their versiion of when the pain stops? Here are a few of mine.
THE PAIN STOPS
1. When I stop it by deciding not to listen or give into the quacking.
2. When I give up my fantasy that things will be like they were in the beginning and our lives will magically be sane again.
3. When I Let Go and really Let Go.
4. When I STOP thinking those thoughts about the A that cause me the pain and START thinking those thoughts of ME and my FUTURE. My new Life without the chaos.
5. When I finally surrender and move on with my life.
Happy Easter to Everyone. Have a great Day!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: MASSACHUSETTS
Posts: 441
I agree with your #4... So true for me too. That's the realization I have been working on lately. I don't talk to him but I realized that he was still very present... In my thoughts. And that was really holding me back.
I was hung up thinking about why none of his actions make sense. Well, they made sense for him and what he wants... Not what I want him to want! My expectations and hopes for this marriages... Projecting them out on to him... And then being hurt when he doesn't meet them.
Self-inflicted wounds are the ones that hurt the most.
I was hung up thinking about why none of his actions make sense. Well, they made sense for him and what he wants... Not what I want him to want! My expectations and hopes for this marriages... Projecting them out on to him... And then being hurt when he doesn't meet them.
Self-inflicted wounds are the ones that hurt the most.
The pain stops when I:
- Sylvie
- am more genuine in my speech.
- remain true to myself and my values.
- live a God-centered life.
- create my own security.
- accept the challenge of redefining my ideals of partnership.
- stop being afraid of the future.
- Sylvie
The pain stops...
... when I really believe myself when I say "I will not accept things from him that I would find unacceptable coming from anyone else."
... when I know, once and for all, where the boundary line between us is.
... when I can stop wondering how my reinforcing and sticking by my boundaries are going to feel inside him.
... when I can stop feeling like a traitor because I prioritized my life.
... when I really believe myself when I say "I will not accept things from him that I would find unacceptable coming from anyone else."
... when I know, once and for all, where the boundary line between us is.
... when I can stop wondering how my reinforcing and sticking by my boundaries are going to feel inside him.
... when I can stop feeling like a traitor because I prioritized my life.
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