And recovery comes first
 

And it should. I'd never question that. Still sucks.

So xah was back in town after his rehab and follow up in another state. He came back to town with almost no plan and the plan he did have was doomed. He saw the boys for a few hours last Sunday and promised them this weekend. He calls and is a giant mess and is going back to where he came from to take advantage of their aftercare program to protect his sobriety and recovery. He has to. All is lost without it and I'm glad he sees that but damn, I have some incredibly heartbroken and confused kids right now. Sometimes it seems like to much for them to carry.

Alcoholism just keeps on sucking the life out of people. Drunk or sober. I'm tired of it always winning.

I held my boundaries (he wanted to stay the weekend :react ) without any trouble. I don't even have a question. Just getting it out there since there is no one here to tell I guess.

It sounds like you did great, Thumper. Yes, it is very sad for your kids, but they (once again) get to see you modeling consistent and rational behavior in the face of the opposite from your ex. That is very important. Also, as much as we want to protect our children from sadness and disappointment, we can only do so much because those things are inherent in life. Facing them with a supportive and emotionally intelligent adult to guide them through can build both character and compassion.

All that being said, I do feel your pain, and hope it passes soon!