Need some support regarding separation
Originally Posted by CoffeeLover 
I'm sure that I will be judged by many members of the church because I am not there for him, but I will just figure out how to pick up the pieces and carry on.
One day at a time, sweetie and keep taking care of yourself and your children. You're doing good.
| The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to tjp613 For This Useful Post: |
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wow.
I just want to give you some serious hugs!
It takes real courage to do what your doing. You KNOW it's the right thing and your following through. I wish I could have your strength.
The guilt is terrible isn't it? I know I feel guilty even though I was offering my RAH a nice check, anything he wants out of the house...and the "better" car...
I didn't WANT to do any of that. It didn't feel right but I didn't know what else to do...he declined and is still here...making it "it is better for me to be here til U graduate in Aug" even though it's really better for HIM to be here til then.
I LET him get away w/ that excuse.... man do I wish I could do what your doing.
Big big hugs from me....you stay strong. You watch out for yourself and your kids...if you don't no one else will!
I just want to give you some serious hugs!
It takes real courage to do what your doing. You KNOW it's the right thing and your following through. I wish I could have your strength.
The guilt is terrible isn't it? I know I feel guilty even though I was offering my RAH a nice check, anything he wants out of the house...and the "better" car...
I didn't WANT to do any of that. It didn't feel right but I didn't know what else to do...he declined and is still here...making it "it is better for me to be here til U graduate in Aug" even though it's really better for HIM to be here til then.
I LET him get away w/ that excuse.... man do I wish I could do what your doing.
Big big hugs from me....you stay strong. You watch out for yourself and your kids...if you don't no one else will!
| The Following User Says Thank You to blwninthewind For This Useful Post: | ToBeSerene (02-13-2011)
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| The Following User Says Thank You to suki44883 For This Useful Post: | ToBeSerene (02-13-2011)
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: MASSACHUSETTS
Posts: 441
Try and follow your gut and head instead of your heart. I am separating too and it is very hard but I must stick to my guns or I will continue the dance. I know you do not think it is manipulation but they will say and do anything to keep us. I am dealing with that also.
PEACE
PEACE
| The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to JACKRUSSELLGIRL For This Useful Post: | blwninthewind (02-13-2011),
ToBeSerene (02-13-2011)
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Originally Posted by suki44883
I thought the church encouraged people not to judge others. If those people do judge you, then they're obviously not getting a lot out of their church.
We don't want people to think badly of us.
I don't think it matters much. They believe that if you pray hard enough God can save any marriage. I actually believe that too. BUT while they pray for saving the marriage...those caught up in this kind of disease, and the pain of living w/ an A spouse...we spend a lot of time praying for the demise of the marriage.
I'm really at that point. I can name many people who are praying for me and my RAH...that we make it. But at what cost?
I don't want to turn this into what we personally believe our higher power can and cannot do ....
but
I gotta say. I don't think mine wants this for me or my kids. I pray daily for gratitude and acceptance. It's working for me.
| The Following User Says Thank You to blwninthewind For This Useful Post: | ToBeSerene (02-13-2011)
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