Time flies

Old 02-06-2011, 09:04 PM
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Time flies

I can't believe it's been another year since I've been back to post. My RAH has 22 months sobriety and it is like being married to a different man! Some of his quirks that used to drive me crazy are still there.....he still loads the dishwasher his way when I know my way is better , he's a morning person and I'm a night owl. Overall though, life is amazing. The alcohol that consumed our lives (him drinking it and me obscessing about him drinking it) is no longer in our home. We have regular date nights, and text each other throughout the day to stay in touch and make each other smile.

So, I am living proof that it CAN happen. For today (and that is all any of us have) it is good. If tomorrow that changes, then it is up to me keep my sanity. I will NEVER go back to the life we lived in our previous marriage, and he knows that. He also knows I mean business, lol. I would not put our children through another break up and make up.

For those of you new here, or even not so new but we haven't "met", this place saved my life. I honestly believe I would still be in the same crazy cycle and still doing the same crazy stuff. I didn't always like what I heard here, but boy there are some smart cookies! I think of you all fondly and pray that each of you find your own peace. We are members of a club we never really wanted to join, but I believe we are all stronger and better people for it. Blessings!!!
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Old 02-06-2011, 09:20 PM
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Thank you so much for sharing. I have spent a great deal of time on this board this weekend and I have heard so much that I know deep down is true. I know I am not alone and I see that my AH's behavior is not "unusual" for an alcoholic. There are wise people here for sure and I know I am doing the right thing by taking care of myself. But through this all I also wanted to hear something with a happy ending. I feel so stupid sometimes for clutching on to hope when all the signs are otherwise. Your relationship sounds like heaven to me right now and I am so happy for you and for him. I also know that you are grateful for every day because that day may be all you have. I'll keep clutching on to my hope a little tighter and a little longer.
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Old 02-07-2011, 04:07 AM
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I'm no longer married to my first husband (we divorced for reasons unrelated to his alcoholism) but he just celebrated his 31st year sober. He is still my best friend--when I go out to visit our college age kids, I stay with him and his wife.

He is a great guy, a terrific dad to our boys, but you'd never have guessed it if you'd seen how he behaved when he was drinking. He was one year sober when we got married, but we'd been together for three "drinking years" before he got sober.

There are happy endings. They take continuous effort on the part of both individuals, but the results are amazing.
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Old 02-07-2011, 04:42 AM
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Thank you so much for checking in and sharing your update! I remember you and your story well.

I'm glad it is your history and no longer your present.

May your days continue to be blessed, One Day at a Time!
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Old 02-07-2011, 05:24 AM
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hi blessed4x and thanks for the update. you sound great.
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Old 02-07-2011, 07:02 AM
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Thanks! It's nice-amidst all the stories of typical outcomes-to hear a story in the forums where someones spouse/child/so does recover.
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Old 02-07-2011, 07:19 AM
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Thanks so much. Please keep checking in from time to time. Naturally most posts come from people in crisis seeking help.There is a real need for posts like yours. My daughter says that going to meetings can a downer when most of what she hears sounds like a retelling of drinking tales and she finally got the courage to say "Please can someone talk how being sober makes your life better"She got what she asked for,stories like yours.
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Old 02-07-2011, 07:33 AM
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How wonderful!!! I'm so happy you stopped by to tell your story.
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Old 02-07-2011, 07:33 AM
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ty for your update blessed4x.. glad to hear you're doing well
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