Chelle3

AH is getting up in the middle of the night after sleeping a few hrs, probably somewhere between 2 and 4am and drinking 4 or 5 beers. He does this if he's drank before he goes to bed and if he hasn't drank anything. He then gets up at 8 and goes to work.

He might be doing this because it's the only way he can go back to sleep.
Is this a different form of "eye openers?"
Anyone else heard of this?

CarelessWhisper

Hi Chelle3.
I don't know if it's common or not, but my AH does the same thing, except when he's not working he does this through out the day. Drink till drunk, nap, get up, drink some more, nap, get up drink some more.....

Taking5

Yes. This is real serious, he is getting to the point where he cannot function without alcohol. Next he'll be drinking AT work - if he's not already. This will mean hard liquor as it is a lot easier to hide than a 6 pack.

In my case, I knew I couldn't drink the way I wanted to and hold down a job, so I started my own business. A little success there, and the ability to set my own hours, and I really went off the deep end with booze.

Where are you in Alabama? I am in Mobile.

Taking5

OMG 3 Alabama folks on one thread! Is that allowed?

Thumper

My xah did the same thing. He didn't drink hard liquor but then he didn't really work much and when he did it was the evening shift and he'd drink before work and then after work. It wasn't long after this that his anxiety began to get worse.

<not from Alabama> <need more posts to restore balance>

laurie6781

Yes it is common. During my drinking days, while I still had a home, I kept a bottle of Jack Daniels next to the bed with a straw in it. Yeah I know SICK! Then my last year and a half when I lived on the streets of Hollywood and slept in my car (typical 'alkie' car, all four corners dented and a coat hanger for a radio antenna) I had 'graduated' to Thunderbird and kept a fifth next to me that I could swig on if I woke up.

It is a 'progressive' illness.

Thankfully that was MANY years ago now.

What are you doing for you? Have you tried AlAnon? Also I found "Co-Dependent No More" by Melodie Beattie extremely helpful once I was sober and clean and then started working on my 'codie issues.'

Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing as we do care so very much.

Love and hugs,

Cyranoak

...and it is also common for codependant enablers like me to make excuses for it by saying, "he might be doing this because it's the only way he can go back to sleep."

I say this in as caring a way as possible, but he's doing it because he's an alcoholic. Alcoholics drink because they are alcohlics. Gently I ask you this, if it were not your husband, would you honestly say to anybody that it is normal behavior to get up in the middle of the night and get drunk?

I believe you already knew the answer to this question. The real problem is what is it about you that thinks what he is doing could possibly be normal, and even makes excuses for it?

He is what he is. You didn't cause, can't control, and can't cure his alcoholism. You can, however, help yourself. Start by going to Al-Anon, give it a chance by going to at least six meetings, some different, and go from there.

You take care now,

Cyranoak

BumblingAlong

My RXABF used to wake up every night and take a couple of shots ; if there was no booze (because he finished it all), he'd take Gravol or Neo Citran or Nyquil....

JenT1968

yes AH did it, probably still does: drink until passes out for a few hours, wakes up (still drunk but thirsty - alcohol dehydrates - and less drunk-which was not a favorite state) so would continue to drink until he passed out again, this could occur 2-3 times a day and through the night.

Chelle3

Hi, dgillz, I'm near B'ham.

I had no idea this was part of getting worse, I thought it was a solution to insomnia. I know I'm watching a bad situation. I'm in counseling. I told him 3 weeks ago I felt he had to get treatment or we could no longer remain married (we've been married 18 yrs and have 2 kids). He immediately chose drinking. We were about to file for divorce when my mom and sister called begging me to try some more, so I agreed to try a little longer, you can always get divorced, but you can't always save your marriage is what they said. Honestly they don't know what this is like.

I'm going to an AA meeting tonight or tomorrow. I'm still taking steps toward protecting myself in case the marriage dissolves-getting a job and going back to school to get my masters.

Thanks all,
Chelle

jrlcpl

Using their logic you can say "well we can always get remarried if he gets into recovery for a long period of time". You have to do what is best for you and your children. No one else knows what you endure and no one else can make these decisions.

Cyranoak

1. Now you know to ignore your mom and sister. They don't know what they are talking about.
2. AA is for alcoholics. Al-Anon is for people like you and me.
3. Good on you for getting a job and going back to school. High five!

Kjell

No. It's not common.

It's probably a sure sign of alcoholism, though I never did that and I'm an alcoholic.

What purpose would drinking 4 or 5 beers in the middle of the night be other than satisfy a craving that he has absolutly no control over?

You already know though, deep down, you know.

wicked

It's a sign! the sign of the armageddon!
oh wait, maybe that was the snowstorm that blew threw here .
:rotfxko

wicked

Chelle,

Please do not listen to anyone who has advice about YOUR life.
I listened and paid heed to everyone but myself.
It will be difficult to believe this, but he did not choose alcohol over you, alcohol is making his choices for him
Choosing treatment himself usually works better than forcing the issue.

I hope you find some serenity for you and your children.

Beth

keepinon

I saw on intervention a guy who drank in the middle of the night and it was to prevent withdrawl..otherwise he would have siezures

Chelle3

JenT1968

way to offer support mom and sis! and when I talk about a societal pressure to stay in marriages no matter what, this is the sort of thing I am talking about. When I heard this sort of thing (not thankfully from family) it was a little hurtful, that they assumed that I hadn't thought long and hard about this, weighed up the pros and cons, begged for change, hoped, wished, given second-millionth chances, and that they thought this was just a whim i'd thought up on the spot.

You can always get remarried (thanks jrlcpl) but you can't always save your sanity,

wicked

just a little idea i had during breakfast.
get a divorce.
sure, no need to wrestle with the decision, beg for him to change, accomodate every desire.

pffffft.

MissGuided