A good night with encouragement
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Join Date: Oct 2006
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A good night with encouragement
Oldest son had a few friends over last night. They were eating pasta in the kitchen and chatting, and in my humble abode, that meant I couldn't help but overhearing it all.
Most of these kids have experience of addicts: one girl's dad was an A who just ditched his family and moved overseas, haven't heard from him since; one girl's dad is the only male on that side of the family who is not an A -- he's never touched a drop of alcohol; one boy used to smoke pot habitually but pretty well had a religious/spiritual awakening and thought better of it, etc.
The way they've rallied around my son after the separation and after he started being honest about what was going on with his dad has been amazing. They are such good kids. And I sat here in tears last night thinking about how... wise they are, even if their wisdom has been attained at a very high cost.
These are kids that have been through the war zones of addiction and survived and thrived. And that gives me great hope that my daughter, who is so full of pain and so confused and strikes out at anyone trying to help... that there might be hope for her, too.
Just wanted to share that.
Most of these kids have experience of addicts: one girl's dad was an A who just ditched his family and moved overseas, haven't heard from him since; one girl's dad is the only male on that side of the family who is not an A -- he's never touched a drop of alcohol; one boy used to smoke pot habitually but pretty well had a religious/spiritual awakening and thought better of it, etc.
The way they've rallied around my son after the separation and after he started being honest about what was going on with his dad has been amazing. They are such good kids. And I sat here in tears last night thinking about how... wise they are, even if their wisdom has been attained at a very high cost.
These are kids that have been through the war zones of addiction and survived and thrived. And that gives me great hope that my daughter, who is so full of pain and so confused and strikes out at anyone trying to help... that there might be hope for her, too.
Just wanted to share that.
Awakening
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Beautiful Texas hillcountry
Posts: 1,272
Originally Posted by lillamy 
The way they've rallied around my son after the separation and after he started being honest about what was going on with his dad has been amazing. They are such good kids. And I sat here in tears last night thinking about how... wise they are, even if their wisdom has been attained at a very high cost.
These are kids that have been through the war zones of addiction and survived and thrived. And that gives me great hope that my daughter, who is so full of pain and so confused and strikes out at anyone trying to help... that there might be hope for her, too.
Just wanted to share that.
These are kids that have been through the war zones of addiction and survived and thrived. And that gives me great hope that my daughter, who is so full of pain and so confused and strikes out at anyone trying to help... that there might be hope for her, too.
Just wanted to share that.
My greatest fears. I've learned to let the past go to a certain extent, and learned about that future stuff as well. But it's difficult to stay in the present sometimes.
I remember LMC saying one time, that she just wished she had a "normal" home, with both parents. I asked her to name all the kids with the "normal 2 parent home". She could only name about two. I pointed out that, sadly, she "was" living the norm.
Lots of kindness and compassion in that kitchen.
Thanks and God bless us all,
Coyote
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Wizard Land Downunder
Posts: 2,615
I recognised a truth over 25 years ago, regarding parents and their kids.
That was, that you could tell your teen the God's honest truth about something, til you turned blue in the face, and you were likely to find they still disbelieved you, or at best still doubted you.
Hear the self same words spoken by their peers, their friends or some "STAR" they adore, and those words are accepted as total truth.....given respect as if they were handed down on tablets of stone.
You can't fight this weird way of the teen world, it just is as it is.
Your girl is blessed to have the support of these "been there", friends......look on them as being her own private Alateen group.
That was, that you could tell your teen the God's honest truth about something, til you turned blue in the face, and you were likely to find they still disbelieved you, or at best still doubted you.
Hear the self same words spoken by their peers, their friends or some "STAR" they adore, and those words are accepted as total truth.....given respect as if they were handed down on tablets of stone.
You can't fight this weird way of the teen world, it just is as it is.
Your girl is blessed to have the support of these "been there", friends......look on them as being her own private Alateen group.
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