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-   -   SIL is an adult child of ALCOHOLIC Parents.... (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/216380-sil-adult-child-alcoholic-parents.html)

fourmaggie 12-27-2010 04:01 PM

SIL is an adult child of ALCOHOLIC Parents....
 
:c004:well....ran into the sister in law today...my late husbands(9 years passing) sister...in the check out....i had both kids(9 & 8) with me....not one word was said to my kids..no HI, no anything...I have NOT seen her and his parents since the funeral....

I did not loose my cool but I wanted to slap her so!!

I introduced the kids to "S" and said to her, "you remember you brothers CHILDREN"...she looks at me, "yes Margaret i do" but still no HI to the children.....

this disease is driving me nuts....I looked at her...."well, you are just like your mother and holding resentments just like her..."..." YEP, i am my mother" she replied....

I am sorry but wtf did my kids ever do to these people??? i dont want them around....but, i want them to at least say hi to them....and this IS NOT MY FAULT!:react

my son walks out and says "Mom, its not worth it" and looked at him and said..." dont you ever forget, you are your FATHERS son!!"

I am just sadden...

comments welcome

LucyA 12-27-2010 04:08 PM

Sounds like your son's been brought up right, knowing true values and what's important. You must have taught him that, even if you didn't do it deliberately.

fourmaggie 12-27-2010 04:23 PM

I know one thing i have never done, is talk BAD about the IN LAWS to my children...they just wonder why they are never around....now with the ILs living up the street...(5 houses down)the kids just seem to GET IT....bright children i have...i learn alot from them!! their dad would be so proud!!!

least 12-27-2010 04:23 PM

Your son is right; she ain't worth it. Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say. Let her go back to the past where she belongs. Not much of a loss, it seems.

LucyA 12-27-2010 04:38 PM


Originally Posted by fourmaggie (Post 2809076)
I know one thing i have never done, is talk BAD about the IN LAWS to my children...they just wonder why they are never around....now with the ILs living up the street...(5 houses down)the kids just seem to GET IT....bright children i have...i learn alot from them!! their dad would be so proud!!!



Maybe they just 'get it' and maybe they are 'bright' but they must have got that from somewhere, maybe it;s their mum who's 'got it' and passed it on to them by showing them how, but just doesn't realise it yet?

Sounds to me like you're doing a great job!

fourmaggie 12-27-2010 04:41 PM

*making me blush* thank you so much for the kind words...I try my best (even with out my husband)

Phoenixthebird 12-27-2010 05:00 PM

fourmaggie, you REALLY don't want me to start talking about my in-laws! I've had to put up SOOOoo much BS from them throughout my marriage......and I don't want to go down that road even in my thoughts!

BUT they are definitely one reason why my DDH has SOOooo much garbage! They are, also, one reason why my DDH needs to go through individual therapy!

Sometimes we are just better to release them and NOT allow them to have any influence upon our lifes! Listen to your son "Mom, its not worth it!" Words of wisdom out of the mouths of babes! Your children are probably better off without your in-laws influence upon their lifes! This doesn't mean they're NOT their father's children......But maybe BECAUSE they are their father's children!

trapeze 12-27-2010 05:15 PM

It is your SIL's loss.

I have a former SIL who, along with my former MIL, never paid any attention to my daughter after the divorce. I will spare the long story, but I finally told my SIL what I thought last week - and my daughter is 30. My daughter thought it was funny - she just doesn't care about that side of the family. And believe it or not, my SIL apologized. Said I was right, they had not treated my daughter as they should have. Go figure.

fourmaggie 12-28-2010 08:02 AM

I have to say one thing...that i am at PEACE but this disease just makes me shake my head in sadness...


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